I just need to know I'm not alone...

[[Ka...]]

Hi, my name is Katie. I am currently 6 weeks pregnant and my psychiatrist put me on an extremely rapid taper of Klonopin. I was taking 2mg/day for anxiety and panic before pregnancy. I told her I was pregnant 2 weeks ago and she said I had to get off of the drug in less than a week. Needless to say, I am feeling awful. I feel like I will never get off this poison alive. I feel like I'm losing it. Is this normal? Will the symptoms get worse? I'm really scared right now. My psychiatrist doesn't think I should have a problem getting off this hellish drug because she "tapered" me. I couldn't believe what she was saying to me. I cried a lot today. I haven't been to work in the last 2 days. My social anxiety is at it's absolute worst right now.

 

I am desperate for support from people who may have been where I am and have gotten through it.

 

Thank you for this amazing place where people can go to get help when the rest of the world doesn't understand.

 

Best,

Katie

[Guest [ba...]]

Hi Katie!  I c/t'd from Ativan just over a year ago.  Before I did Ativan, I did klonopin for about 5 years.

 

The extremely rapid taper probably didn't help you very much (if at all).  However, you're going to be fine.  The feelings you describe are very normal.  It's hard to say if your symptoms will get worse, since it's pretty difficult to know exactly what you're dealing with right now.  Usually, the first 2-4 weeks are the worst, but there is often some improvement during that time.

 

There's the physical stuff (tremor, sweats, palpitations, etcetera).  That stuff feels lousy, but it's the anxiety that you really want to work on as you can add to those feelings if you are not careful.  If you're not already seeing a therapist for your anxiety, I highly recommend it.  Maybe your current psychiatrist can help you, but in my experience they seem happier supplying drugs to people than helping them to work through their problems.  Withdrawal often causes increased anxiety for a time.  It's a good time to begin to develop coping strategies to deal with that anxiety.

 

Learn to stay busy or to distract yourself.  Working was really good for me (even through I felt like crap).  It gave me some structure and occupied my mind (and it paid the bills).  Do what you can do eliminate stress in your life.  Please don't be scared.  You're going to be fine.  Just take this a day at a time and before you know it, you'll begin to feel a little better.

 

Please also avoid 'googling' every little symptoms that you get and thinking the worst.  You may be experiencing some tremor (shaking).  That's perfectly normal - you're not coming down with Parkinson's or anything like that.  Eat healthy, be as active as you can, and try to relax.

 

And congratulations on your pregnancy!

[[be...]]

I am sorry you are feeling so badly. Stopping benzodiazepines too rapidly can cause some pretty horrible symptoms. I know firsthand what you are going through. I stopped 8 mg of Ativan cold turkey 14 months ago. It sounds like you are in the acute phase of withdrawal.  During the acute period symptoms are their very worst. Fortunately it does not last forever. My acute phase was about 3 to 4 weeks. During this phase my symptoms were pretty horrific. By my third month my symptoms became more predictable and manageable. I improved each month after that. You will get through this. Hopefully you will feel some relief soon.

[[Ka...]]

Thank you, both, from the bottom of my heart, for your words. I have hope and am not so scared now. Ever since I left my psychiatrist's office 2 weeks ago, I've been in a fearful state. I thought for sure I'd never get this far into it. I didn't know what was going to happen to me. I just knew getting off a benzo was not going to be fun. I asked my psychiatrist if I would have horrible withdrawals and she looked up at me like I was asking a stupid question and said,"No, you'll be fine. I'm weaning you off." That's when I lost my last bit of faith in doctors and I never want to rely on a doctor that thinks nothing will happen when I CT a benzo. She wanted me completely off the klonopin a week and a half ago. I have been going down a little slower than that. I'm on .25mg in the morning.

 

My anxiety is definitely worse right now. And I had very bad heart palps this week. I had night sweats the first week. My head is pounding. I feel very foggy and can't concentrate on work. Although, work makes me feel like something is normal in my life.

 

In a way, I am very grateful that everything happened the way it did. I was always too scared to get off these poison pills before. Now I'm forced to do it.

 

Thank you again for letting me see a light at the end of the tunnel

 

Best,

Katie

 

[[Ch...]]

Hi Katie and welcome from me, too 

 

The symptoms you've described are very much par for the course in benzodiazepine withdrawal.  Anxiety, heart palpitations, cognition problems, headaches, night sweats (and if they're gone already, that's a sign that you may heal quickly)... those are all very common in withdrawal. 

 

I see a history of Xanax, too.  Did you taper the Xanax?  How did that withdrawal go?

 

Challis 

[[xe...]]

Thank you, both, from the bottom of my heart, for your words. I have hope and am not so scared now.

 

I'm glad you're feeling better now! I just wanted to say that fear, itself, is the biggest and most common symptom of benzo w/d -- so don't be surprised if it comes back in waves, and when it does, try to just tell yourself mentally that it's an unpleasant but temporary condition. And when you do find yourself feeling better, it can be useful to write that down someplace so you can look at it the next time things seem really screwy.

[[Ka...]]

Thank you everyone

 

This is the middle of my 3rd week of a very rapid taper. Tomorrow I will go down to half of my .25mg. Then I'm off of them. I am also weaning off Effexor XR 150mg. I am past halfway through that. I feel like I can't handle any stress. Even the slightest of stressors. My family came out for my birthday this weekend and I felt like I was walking around stuck in a cloud. Everything felt dream like. My anxiety is almost controllable if I take deep breaths and tell myself to breathe. But that is usually when I'm alone, at home. I have no appetite. And I just want to cry. I'm trying to stay positive but I'm having a rough day today.

 

My withdrawal from Xanax happened when I was on Klonopin. I don't remember having anything like that when I was coming down from that. It was also a quick withdrawal.

 

My heart palps come and go now. They haven't stuck around like they did when I jumped from 1mg to .5mg. That was rough. I have a bad migraine today. I also feel like everyone is judging me...like I'm a bad person. I keep trying to tell myself that it isn't true but the anxiety is flooding in.

 

All I want is a healthy baby. I hope I am doing what is right.

 

Thank you all again for listening to me and responding. It really helps me.

 

Katie

[Guest [ba...]]

I know exactly what you mean about having stressors around.  It was really hard for me to be in stressful situations too.  I did everything that I could to clear the decks of stress.  Of course, it's not always possible, so you just breathe, and hang in there as best you can.  I found that as long as I smiled and laughed occasionally, that I could manage social stuff - even when my brain was functioning at 40%.

 

Those feelings of being judged are really normal.  Just remember that it's in your head and that people aren't really judging you any more than they normally do (which probably isn't much).