Should I go back on?

[[Jo...]]

So I was clear for 6 months, May 17. I never thought for a second about taking xanax again until I got tinnitis really bad in both ears in mid-November. I tried xanax again half a dozen times. The tinnitis went away.  But more importantly I noticed I had my old undamaged mind back.  I was able to think clearly.

 

I went off again but now I'm starting to wonder if my brain has been permanently damaged. I'm starting to wonder if I should go back on the xanax for the rest of my life. 

 

My short term memory is shot. I can't remember anything to save my life.  Worse I'm making some incredibly stupid mistakes.  For example, I was in a car accident and instead of calling the other guy's insurance I called mine and filed the claim.  I'm middle aged, I know what to do in a car accident but it didn't occur to me I'd made a mistake until days later.  There have been other things I've done or forgotten to do that are starting to really worry me.

 

I'm starting to worry I have early dementia. I've read that benzo use can cause memory impairment. Is that true?  Can benzos permanently damage the mind? Can they help bring about dementia?

[[sn...]]

I'm in a nightmare from Ativan!  I have severe, severe memory loss.  It's been like this for 4 years and I'm scared.  When I try to think of the days of the weeks or months it's all blank.  I'm scared out of my mind all day.  My doctor says its permanent but I have to get off of this poison and see how I heal.  Please, try to stay off. 

[[po...]]

I have had similar memory problems. What I have done and continue to do is exercise the mind with lumosity.com and mathematics on khanacademy.com. I struggle, ie. the other day the number 3 was 2 and i kept making mistakes. I also use buddhist mindfullness practice to deal with the frustration and it helps. These activities with regular physical exercise ie weightlifting and yoga are helping my mind to repair itself, there is science that proves it neuroplasticity, the mind can heal...I also have had brain injury.

 

The mind heals all you have to do is find exercise for it and very quickly you will see the result..

 

I hope this helps

[[Jo...]]

Oh my. 4 years? I'm so sorry.  This is what worries me, that I won't get my old mind back.

 

porter12345, I keep hearing exercise is necessary.  I'm guilty of not doing that.

[[Ch...]]

So I was clear for 6 months, May 17. I never thought for a second about taking xanax again until I got tinnitis really bad in both ears in mid-November. I tried xanax again half a dozen times. The tinnitis went away.  But more importantly I noticed I had my old undamaged mind back.  I was able to think clearly.

I went off again but now I'm starting to wonder if my brain has been permanently damaged. I'm starting to wonder if I should go back on the xanax for the rest of my life. 

 

My short term memory is shot. I can't remember anything to save my life.  Worse I'm making some incredibly stupid mistakes.  For example, I was in a car accident and instead of calling the other guy's insurance I called mine and filed the claim.  I'm middle aged, I know what to do in a car accident but it didn't occur to me I'd made a mistake until days later.  There have been other things I've done or forgotten to do that are starting to really worry me.

 

I'm starting to worry I have early dementia. I've read that benzo use can cause memory impairment. Is that true?  Can benzos permanently damage the mind? Can they help bring about dementia?

 

This, to me, is all I would need to realize the issues I was having were due to GABA receptors not yet healed...and that once they are healed, which only time can/no benzos can do, the mind will be fine again.

 

Until then, it is probably best to avoid decisions if possible and think very carefully before acting on anything.  This is temporary.  Going back on benzodiazepines will down-regulate the GABA receptors again and make the next withdrawal potentially (but likely) worse.

 

Here are two pieces of writing I found helpful and keep in my notes.  Long but worth a read:

 

Reinstatement, updosing

 

A dilemma faced by some people in the process of benzodiazepine withdrawal, or after withdrawal, is what to do if they have intolerable symptoms which do not lessen after many weeks. If they are still taking benzodiazepines, should they increase the dose? If they have already withdrawn, should they reinstate benzodiazepines and start the withdrawal process again? This is a difficult situation which, like all benzodiazepine problems, depends to some degree on the circumstances and the individual, and there are no hard and fast rules.

 

Reinstatement after withdrawal? Many benzodiazepine users who find themselves in this position have withdrawn too quickly; some have undergone 'cold turkey'. They think that if they go back on benzodiazepines and start over again on a slower schedule they will be more successful. Unfortunately, things are not so simple. For reasons that are not clear, (but perhaps because the original experience of withdrawal has already sensitised the nervous system and heightened the level of anxiety) the original benzodiazepine dose often does not work the second time round. Some may find that only a higher dose partially alleviates their symptoms, and then they still have to go through a long withdrawal process again, which again may not be symptom-free.

 

Updosing during withdrawal? Some people hit a "sticky patch" during the course of benzodiazepine withdrawal. In many cases, staying on the same dose for a longer period (not more than a few weeks) before resuming the withdrawal schedule allows them to overcome this obstacle. However, increasing the dose until a longed-for plateau of 'stability' arrives is not a good strategy. The truth is that one never 'stabilises' on a given dose of benzodiazepine. The dose may be stable but withdrawal symptoms are not. It is better to grit one's teeth and continue the withdrawal. True recovery cannot really start until the drug is out of the system.

 

Pharmacologically, neither reinstating nor updosing is really rational. If withdrawal symptoms are still present, it means that the GABA/benzodiazepine receptors have not fully recovered (see above). Further benzodiazepines cause further down-regulation, strengthen the dependence, prolong withdrawal, delay recovery and may lead to protracted symptoms. In general, the longer the person remains on benzodiazepines the more difficult it is to withdraw. On the whole, anyone who remained benzodiazepine-free, or has remained on the same dose, for a number of weeks or months would be ill-advised to start again or to increase dosage. It would be better to devote the brain to solving individual symptoms and to finding sources of advice and support. Advice about how to deal with individual symptoms is given in the Manual (Chapter 3).

Recovery Tips [nobbc]http://www.psychmedaware.org/recovery_tips.html[/nobbc]

 

1. Recovery from bei ng an accidental addict to benzodiazepines is serious business. It takes time for the central nervous system to heal and for neurotransmitters to stop being sensitive. None of us had the faintest idea that this kind of situation lay in front of us. So we are dealing with shock at what has happened as well as the real physical and mental/emotional symptoms of withdrawal.

 

2. Recovery is not linear, as it is with other illnesses or injuries. If we cut our hands, we can actually see the cut heal and the pain diminish over time. In benzo withdrawal we can be well one day and very sick the next. This is normal and we have to look at our healing differently.

 

3. Recovery is an individual thing, and it is difficult to predict how quickly symptoms will stop for good. People expect to be completely better after a certain period of time, and often get discouraged and depressed when they feel this time has passed and they are not completely better. Most patient support programs tell clients to anticipate 6 months to a year for recovery after a taper has ended. But some people feel better a few months after they stop taking benzos; for others it takes more than a year to feel completely better. Try not to be obsessed with how long it will take, because every day you stay off benzos, your body is healing at its own rate. If you do not follow this particular schedule, it does not mean there is something wrong or you are not healing. Even if you are feeling ill in some respects, other symptoms may disappear. Even people in difficult tapers see improvements in symptoms very early on. So don’t let these time-frames scare you. The way you feel at one month will not be how you will be feeling at three months or at six months.

 

4. It is very typical to have setbacks at different points of time (these times can vary). These setbacks can be so intense that people feel their healing hasn’t happened at all; they feel they have been taken right back to beginning. Setbacks, if they occur, are a normal part of recovery.

 

5. When people are in recovery, they have a lot of fears. One is that they will never get better. Another is that their symptoms are really what they are like — perhaps what they have always been like. Both of these fears are stimulated by benzo withdrawal. In other words they are the thought components of benzo withdrawal, just as insomnia is a physical component.

 

6. There is no way around benzo withdrawal and recovery—you have to go through it. People try all sorts of measures to try to make the pain stop, but nothing can shortcut the process. Our body and brain have their own agenda for healing, and it will take place if you simply accept it.

 

7. When you are having a bad spell, healing is still going on. People typically find that after a bad spell, symptoms improve and often go away forever. Try to remember this when times are hard.

 

8. There is no magic cure to recovery, but you can help yourself by comforting and reassuring yourself as much as possible. Read reassuring information, stay away from stress, ask your partner, family and others for reassurance, and go back to the things you did at the beginning if you are experiencing really tough symptoms.

 

9. When we start to feel better, it is very typical to try to do too much. We are grateful to be alive and we have energy for the first time in weeks or months. But this can be a dangerous time. When we do to much and take on too much too early, it re-sensitizes the nervous system. It doesn’t prevent healing in the long term, but it can make us feel discouraged. So try to pace yourself, even if you are feeling good.

 

10. You do need to respect your body during recovery, although you don’t need to make drastic changes to your lifestyle. Exercise, in any form is critical—even if you can only walk around the house or to the end of the block. Eating well and avoiding all stimulants is crucial. Regular high-protein snacks can help with the shakes and the feelings of weakness we have during withdrawal and recovery.

 

11. Recovery is all about acceptance, but this does not mean passive acceptance. Set small goals for yourself that are achievable. Try to keep exercise happening. Work at your recovery even if that means accepting you are sick—for now. You wouldn’t be hard on yourself if you were in a traffic accident and had injuries; you would work at rehab. Try to take the same attitude and approach to benzodiazepine withdrawal.

 

 

[[Te...]]

I'm glad Challis posted the info about benzo w/d. It's very important to stay off the drug until healing is complete.

 

I would never have realized a few months ago that my life would begin changing suddenly for the better, which has happened in the past month. When we're in the midst of symptoms that keep going on and on, it seems that they'll never end and that life will be this way forever. But I'm finally beginning to see the positive results of staying off benzo drugs. I'm not entirely healed yet and probably have quite a ways to go, but I can function now in ways I never dreamed of just a month ago.

 

 

[[Ga...]]

i still have hissing ears, im convinced xanax damages something. my balance is way off, too

[[Jo...]]

4. It is very typical to have setbacks at different points of time (these times can vary). These setbacks can be so intense that people feel their healing hasn’t happened at all; they feel they have been taken right back to beginning. Setbacks, if they occur, are a normal part of recovery.

 

5. When people are in recovery, they have a lot of fears. One is that they will never get better. Another is that their symptoms are really what they are like — perhaps what they have always been like. Both of these fears are stimulated by benzo withdrawal.

 

Thank you for posting this.  Definitely print and read daily. 

 

It's hard when you're on your own. And scary.  It's easy to lose track, forget what it's like to be who you were and wonder if you're stuck being this way the rest of your life. 

 

I've read several times here that my brain is healing.  It is difficult to hang on to that sometimes. I used to be really sharp mentally.  I hope that comes back. 

 

So Terry when you say you're feeling better, I guess from what you say it happened suddenly?  I've been slogging along for months.  It's so frustrating.

[[Jo...]]

Until then, it is probably best to avoid decisions if possible and think very carefully before acting on anything.

 

Thanks.  Decisions have actually been difficult.  I thought it was a sign something is wrong with me. 

 

I appreciate you saying this.

 

 

[Guest [ma...]]

Hi John,

 

I am sure you are aware that benzos are ototoxic and can cause tinnitus. Tinnitus is a known and common side effect during w/d and recovery from benzos. There are many theories regarding the causes but excess Glutamate is one. I agree with the person who told you that it was w/d related, and I feel this is further substantiated by the fact that the tinnitus went away when you took the Xanax again.

 

I developed tinnitus in 1996? and had problems sleeping. The tinnitus was the reason I was taking something for insomnia. Well fast forward to years later and stopping all drugs, the tinnitus became so loud that it hurt my ears all the time, and I spent my days thinking of a way out. I was desperate and despondent.

 

The good news is that most of the time now I can't hear any ringing in my ears. It's actually better now than it was before the drugs. There is hope and time is the healer. I hope you can be patient and hang in there.

 

As far as your concerns about your cognitive and intellectual changes. I thought I was brain damaged. I did not even recognize the alphabet at one point in my w/d. Today my cognitive and intellectual abilities are better than they have been my entire life. You will get back to where you were before taking the Xanax. 

[[Fi...]]

Count me as another vote for not going back on the Xanax.  I took one rescue dose ten days after a CT of the very small amount I was taking.  It fixed me up so fast, I took it as proof positive that I had been addicted.  Never took another tab.  I had major cog fog after surgery and Oxycodone.  It has slowly gotten better and in fact, I now think I'm better than I was before I ever went on Xanax in the first place.  I thought I was just getting old (I'm 63) but now I think my Xanax use was giving me problems in tolerance.  That's also when I started having tinnitus.  That seems better now and I'm still hoping that it will improve even more the longer I'm off the Xanax.  Since the main advice for dealing with tinnitus is to try to ignore it, it's the one symptom I've NOT carefully tracked!

 

To repeat, I think the fact that you felt better when you went back on the Xanax does not mean you need to be on this drug forever.  It simply proves you've been in withdrawal and will need to stick it out to see your way to well.  I'm rooting for you. 

[[no...]]

John,

Just want to weigh in here- I am three and a half years off, and I want to warn you against taking any rescue doses or any form of reinstatement. The fact that when you took the rescue doses your anxiety attacks came back are to me a more important sign than the relief of any tinnitus- yes, its proof that your tinnitus is from withdrawal, but the fact that the anxiety came back is what you need to be mindful of. For many- myself included- prolonged use, and reinstatement can result in the anxiety becoming worse, not better. And the on and off yo-yo use can really make the inevitable withdrawal much more difficult- I am here to testify to that. I say inevitable- because staying on for life is a losing game. You already have tolerance as signified by the increased anxiety when on it, and over time one has to keep increasing the dosage just to maintain status quo.My reinstatements (one precisely because I believed a dr who told me I needed it for life) made my eventual w/d more difficult...but - still possible and now successful. I had tinnitus too..and its gone. Stay the course!

north

[[Jo...]]

As far as your concerns about your cognitive and intellectual changes. I thought I was brain damaged. I did not even recognize the alphabet at one point in my w/d. Today my cognitive and intellectual abilities are better than they have been my entire life. You will get back to where you were before taking the Xanax.

 

Wow really?  And now you're back where you were before?  Thanks. I really need to hear this. 

 

To repeat, I think the fact that you felt better when you went back on the Xanax does not mean you need to be on this drug forever.  It simply proves you've been in withdrawal and will need to stick it out to see your way to well

 

Right. Withdrawal.  So the symptoms I'm having are not real; well they're real in the sense that I'm having them but they are signs of withdrawal.  So what I'm beginning to understand is the withdrawal symptoms are signs the brain is healing. 

 

Stupid question but when I never longer have symptoms I'm basically back to where I was?  And it's actually possible to be my old self again?  Seriously?

 

For many- myself included- prolonged use, and reinstatement can result in the anxiety becoming worse, not better.

 

Tinnitis is bad but those anxiety attacks are, for me, absolutely debilitating.  Can't think, can't function, makes my job nearly impossible.  I'm a single parent and my kids need me but so many times I've failed. I lost it one day because I couldn't make a simple omelete; I ended up on the floor.

 

But I shouldn't go back on because my brain is healing.  Look forward not back right?

 

>breathe in<

>breathe out<

 

[[Lo...]]

I'm glad Challis posted the info about benzo w/d. It's very important to stay off the drug until healing is complete.

 

I would never have realized a few months ago that my life would begin changing suddenly for the better, which has happened in the past month. When we're in the midst of symptoms that keep going on and on, it seems that they'll never end and that life will be this way forever. But I'm finally beginning to see the positive results of staying off benzo drugs. I'm not entirely healed yet and probably have quite a ways to go, but I can function now in ways I never dreamed of just a month ago.

 

i am so happy for you......my healing started to get better to. especially in this last month. I'm happy you are starting to see the results. i know you had it pretty rough. all we need to do is stay off these drugs people. healing does happen. just give it more time everyone. love you guys and sending beautiful energy out to you guys.  :smitten:   the deep dark place does start going away. i can't stress this enough. i never thought it would. but its happening. time eating right and exercise is whats needed.

[[Te...]]

Hi John, I'm seeing a lot of changes suddenly in my 10th month off. For me it's taken a long time. But the further I get out, the more rapidly my symptoms seem to cycle rather than hanging around for weeks on end. They've also lessened in intensity. The hugest thing for me was that one morning I woke up and wasn't dizzy at all. I just figured it would last for a day and the dizziness would come back. And maybe it will. Dizziness was so debilitating that I was often housebound. But I haven't had it for around three weeks now, and that's more than I ever could have hoped for before.

 

So hang in there!

[[Lo...]]

So I was clear for 6 months, May 17. I never thought for a second about taking xanax again until I got tinnitis really bad in both ears in mid-November. I tried xanax again half a dozen times. The tinnitis went away.  But more importantly I noticed I had my old undamaged mind back.  I was able to think clearly.

 

I went off again but now I'm starting to wonder if my brain has been permanently damaged. I'm starting to wonder if I should go back on the xanax for the rest of my life. 

 

My short term memory is shot. I can't remember anything to save my life.  Worse I'm making some incredibly stupid mistakes.  For example, I was in a car accident and instead of calling the other guy's insurance I called mine and filed the claim.  I'm middle aged, I know what to do in a car accident but it didn't occur to me I'd made a mistake until days later.  There have been other things I've done or forgotten to do that are starting to really worry me.

 

I'm starting to worry I have early dementia. I've read that benzo use can cause memory impairment. Is that true?  Can benzos permanently damage the mind? Can they help bring about dementia?

 

please john don't reinstate.  it took me a year to start seeing results. i tell you what its worth all the time i struggled. i learned a lot through this and still learning. we have to go to hell and back to get off this crap but when you start coming back you are back and better than you where. give it time. these are the hardest drugs to get off of because its so freakin mental and physical but it is possible and worth it. you can do this man.

[[Fi...]]

Absolutely, John, stay the course.  You are on the right track.

 

Hey, can you all stand some corniness?  The other day I thought of the words of the song at the end of the musical "Carousel."  It always made me cry, but suddenly our situation just seems tailor-made to hear these words again:

 

When you walk through a storm, hold your head up high

And don't be afraid at the dark

At the end of the storm is a golden sky

And the sweet silver song of the lark

Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart

And you'll never walk alone

You'll never walk alone....

 

Longwalk, I'm still following your inspirational story!  I know you had to experience that sensation of falling in a bit of a pit after first having that good time when you made it to the store, but that seems to be the way it goes.  Just keep on keeping on, everybody!

 

And by the way, this talk of tinnitus is making me realize mine is getting better.  John, I'm really hopeful about EVERYTHING being better than ever once I'm well.  I'm seeing evidence of it every day.  So forget reinstating!

[Guest [ma...]]

As far as your concerns about your cognitive and intellectual changes. I thought I was brain damaged. I did not even recognize the alphabet at one point in my w/d. Today my cognitive and intellectual abilities are better than they have been my entire life. You will get back to where you were before taking the Xanax.

 

Wow really?  And now you're back where you were before?  Thanks. I really need to hear this. 

 

 

I would say as far as intellect and cognition better than I can ever remember. The insight I have been given into how my brain works, how I perceive things, and how my CNS reacts to stress has been invaluable. I don't like the way that I had to gain this insight, but I had to find something positive from this experience and these are just a few of the many positives.

 

You are well on your way to healing. Take good care. mandala

 

 

 

 

[[Jo...]]

When you walk through a storm, hold your head up high

And don't be afraid at the dark

At the end of the storm is a golden sky

And the sweet silver song of the lark

Walk on, walk on, with hope in your heart

And you'll never walk alone

You'll never walk alone....

 

I love corniness. 

 

I'm trusting what you and other folks here say.  I really, really want to get my mind and body back to where it was.  If you don't mind me asking, what did this experience teach you about your central nervous system?

[[Jo...]]

please john don't reinstate.  it took me a year to start seeing results. i tell you what its worth all the time i struggled. i learned a lot through this and still learning. we have to go to hell and back to get off this crap but when you start coming back you are back and better than you where. give it time. these are the hardest drugs to get off of because its so freakin mental and physical but it is possible and worth it. you can do this man.

 

A year.  Okay.  I see what the 6 rescue dosages have done to me - huge anxiety attacks. I took this week off as a matter of fact because I was having so much trouble doing my job. Just like when I quit back in May.  Those doses weren't worth it. Huge mistake.  I hope I haven't wasted the 6 months I was clean.

 

I worry about my mind.  I'm getting older. I saw my uncle and my stepmother go through and ultimately die from Alzheimers.  I don't want. It scares me when I open a kitchen drawer and the stapler is there, or my son asks me about something and I have no clue what he's talking about.

 

I really hope memory returns.

[[Fi...]]

John, how old are you?  I'm 63.  You ask what I've learned about my central nervous system.  Good question!  I think what I've learned is to have faith in it and its ability to heal.  I used to feel doctors were gods and you had to run to them to get fixed with surgery or drugs for anything that went awry.  Now I've been tuning in to the idea that our bodies and brains WANT to heal if we will let them.  And that means getting off of as much as possible.  From reading stories on this board I see how different we all are.  I never had a bit of trouble getting off of Lexapro, even though I've heard of others having brain zaps.  But then when I read about people being on prednisone I just quiver in my boots.  I was prescribed 10 days of that for a suspected viral ear infection and I went absolutely manic.  It was actually kind of a fun, wild ride because I locked myself in my office and finished up a book I was writing in record time.  Nothing could stop me!  I was so powerful!  So brilliant!  When my doc later found out about this, she was quite alarmed and put a note on my chart that I must never be given this stuff again.  She said they'd had one guy who went manic and they never really got him back!  Don't know his long term outcome, but the point of the story for me was that my particular brain is apparently sensitive along these lines.  So now, I just feel like whatever is dished up to me to cope with in recovery is my particular slate of symptoms.  But I can feel my own brain coming back and I'm rooting for it!

 

So yeah, please don't reinstate.  Just keep reminding yourself that the quickest way through this is THROUGH it.  Detours and attempted shortcuts will only make the journey longer in the end.

 

Did you say you have two kids you take care of on your own?  See if you can be a hero for them.  When they're grown up and they look back, it will be an inspiration to them what you endured in order to be well for them.  Maybe this will help them in whatever challenges they find themselves facing.

 

[[Jo...]]

I'm 53. Though the past few months I've felt more like 103. 

 

Wow I'm sorry about your reaction.  That's awful.  I've taken prednisone many times without a reaction.  This whole thing is brand new to me as I've never had a reaction or side effects to any med I've been prescribed until now.  You sound much more in tune with  your body than I've been.  I hear what you're saying.  I've been introduced to the idea that these symptoms are the mind and body healing.  This is a radical new thought to me.  I hadn't thought of it that. I must admit it's difficult to trust in the midst of an unexplained anxiety attack.  But so many here say it's so.  I really want to believe it to be so..

 

So you can really feel a difference?  You can feel it coming back?

 

Yes I have a son and a daughter.  I haven't said anything to them.  Actually I've interalized this entire experience until I found this board. I think they've noticed something because both have commented several times about how poor my memory has gotten.  You really think I should say something about this to them?

[[ba...]]

Hi John

 

I took xanax for 30 months starting at 3/2012 .75mg a day around  a year later i reduced to .25 mg a day i took 0.0625mg (1/8th of a .50 mg pill ) if i could do it all over again i wouldve water tapered so i couldve made the 0.0625mg smaller at least half that dose size since today after 4 months i still feel awefull some days im trying trying to keep myself ocupied to not notice the tinnittus . So i STRONLY recommend reducing your xanax to alot smaller than .25mg before quiting John

[[Fi...]]

John--I was thinking more about when you're all past this and looking back, telling stories of the tough times you've made it through.  But I'm surprised you haven't said anything to them.  Depending on how old they are, I don't know that you can expect to enlist themas a source of a lot of help and understanding--ha!  I've had trouble getting this from my young adult, married kids--but it might help to let them know something's going on.  Somebody else wrote on the board here an explanation I thought was brilliant.  Wish I'd heard it earlier on.  She said (and full credit to whoever this was) to explain that you are suffering from temporary brain damage due to a bad reaction you had to drugs which your doctors prescribed for you.  Isn't that elegant?  It steers away from the way I'd always start in, leading with something about having trouble getting off of drugs and then of course people just pull back.

 

But this is the truth.  It's a temporary situation and it would help you a lot if they could just bear with you.  This process makes people feel lousy about themselves until they find their way to this board and find out they are not alone and they are not nuts or wimpy or whiners or whatever.

 

As far as thinking of the symptoms as signs of healing, yeah, I used to be totally resistant to that thought.  It seemed pretty clear to me that having symptoms showed things were still out of whack, period.  But now I've kind of come around to the idea that the symptoms themselves ARE the signs of the brain readjusting itself.  And to try to keep a positive spin on it, if you're still having symptoms, it means you're still in line for more cognitive improvements.

 

You know what?  Writing this to you has made ME feel better!  Because when I'm down, like today, with crushing fatigue, it's hard to believe I'm improving.  But this thing about my mind getting sharper is for real and I need to remind myself of that evidence more often.

 

You are doing a really hard thing which requires a lot of bravery, John.  Hang in there!

[Guest [Ty...]]

 

I would say as far as intellect and cognition better than I can ever remember. The insight I have been given into how my brain works, how I perceive things, and how my CNS reacts to stress has been invaluable. I don't like the way that I had to gain this insight, but I had to find something positive from this experience and these are just a few of the many positives.

 

You are well on your way to healing. Take good care. mandala

 

Mandala---you give me great hope.  Thank you for that!

Ginger (aka Tybee)