PTSD?

[[Ma...]]

I feel like I have PTSD from all this. When I think I what I went through I get a hopeless feeling and the dpdr gets bad again. I felt this before and it got some better but now it's unbearable. Anyone else experience darkness when they think of this?

[[Be...]]

Yes, Maymay.  This trauma we're going through is so horrendous everyday.  No amount of counseling will make this right for me now.  It wouldn't fix it anyway.

[Guest [ba...]]

Yes.  I got a PTSD evaluation about a year ago shortly after I jumped off Ativan (I was never PTSD before).  I had most of the classic symptoms, but I now realize that they were induced by the stupid benzo use/withdrawal.  On the good side, my symptoms/feelings have greatly resolved.  That's not often the case for 'real' PTSD.  There are those who claim that individuals with (real) PTSD never really get over it (and there are some who claim that it's possible in time). 

 

So while you may feel that way now, there is hope down the line.

[[lo...]]

I know how bad you both are feeling.

 

I am lucky as I am getting better. The strange thing is I can't really remember the awful times.  I know they happened, I know what happened, but I can't recall how it felt. It is as if it doesn't matter now.

 

I hope you both get some respite soon.

 

Hugs

 

LF 

[[Ba...]]

I was given a diagnosis of PTSD when I was in the psych ward and in Valium withdrawal.I think I had been telling very dramatic stories about my childhood.

 

In art therapy I was told to draw a tree. So I draw A tree, but misjudged the size of the paper and run out of room at the top. This tree is too tall for the page, but what the heck. Oh no, no, no. This is art THERAPY. I drew A tree. Yes, a single tree. This means I feel alone (not surrounded by other little trees? Or ,maybe trees that outgrew their page?). Well, ok.

But we are not done yet,  with the poor lonely tree. It doesn't fit the page,so what does that mean? It means that I've been suffering under the oppression of others! Wow ,now they tell me

 

Later I notice other people felt  free to draw lots of trees ,and that their trees fit the page.

 

 

I never did tell the therapists that I'm a lousy artist.

After all,what did I know

[[Ma...]]

Yes.  I got a PTSD evaluation about a year ago shortly after I jumped off Ativan (I was never PTSD before).  I had most of the classic symptoms, but I now realize that they were induced by the stupid benzo use/withdrawal.  On the good side, my symptoms/feelings have greatly resolved.  That's not often the case for 'real' PTSD.  There are those who claim that individuals with (real) PTSD never really get over it (and there are some who claim that it's possible in time). 

 

So while you may feel that way now, there is hope down the line.

Thank you. I feel that too. When I felt better of I didn't think about the symptoms I didn't feel so hopeless. Hopefully it fizzles out soon.

[[Ma...]]

Yes, Maymay.  This trauma we're going through is so horrendous everyday.  No amount of counseling will make this right for me now.  It wouldn't fix it anyway.

I was thinking of counseling but I feel this way too.

[[Be...]]

I was diagnosed with PTSD too at a clinic.  I was on the benzo's then and having tolerance w/d I guess.  Also being abused on the job and verbal abuse at home by a friend.  Double whammy

[[Ma...]]

I know how bad you both are feeling.

 

I am lucky as I am getting better. The strange thing is I can't really remember the awful times.  I know they happened, I know what happened, but I can't recall how it felt. It is as if it doesn't matter now.

 

I hope you both get some respite soon.

 

Hugs

 

LF 

Thanks LF. I get this too. When I felt better I felt it didn't matter because it was gone. Well it's back and I remember well now. Lol

[[Ma...]]

I was given a diagnosis of PTSD when I was in the psych ward and in Valium withdrawal.I think I had been telling very dramatic stories about my childhood.

 

In art therapy I was told to draw a tree. So I draw A tree, but misjudged the size of the paper and run out of room at the top. This tree is too tall for the page, but what the heck. Oh no, no, no. This is art THERAPY. I drew A tree. Yes, a single tree. This means I feel alone (not surrounded by other little trees? Or ,maybe trees that outgrew their page?). Well, ok.

But we are not done yet,  with the poor lonely tree. It doesn't fit the page,so what does that mean? It means that I've been suffering under the oppression of others! Wow ,now they tell me

 

Later I notice other people felt  free to draw lots of trees ,and that their trees fit the page.

 

 

I never did tell the therapists that I'm a lousy artist.

After all,what did I know

That's a cool story. I would have drawn the same tree not knowing what they would have said. Lol

[[Ma...]]

I was diagnosed with PTSD too at a clinic.  I was on the benzo's then and having tolerance w/d I guess.  Also being abused on the job and verbal abuse at home by a friend.  Double whammy

Wow you did get the double whammy. People are so rude.

[[Be...]]

I can hardly remember anything anymore.  I've got dementia.  I do wake up remembering the bad anxiety and trauma I suffered this summer from all the kids screaming all day long from sunup until after dark.  Chainsaws, trucks revving, 4 wheelers, motorcycles revving, etc.  Unrelenting noise outside.  I have hyeracusis so badly and I thought I would die from all the noise.  I remember that stuff.  My s/x's combined with all the trauma experiences.  I was two months off the benzo's and had to go to my disability hearing.  Hugely big deal.  If they ruled I didn't qualify for disability, I'd be homeless on the streets.  Talk about high stakes.  That day was bitter cold outside and in here and I paced all morning until I had to drive to the hearing.  Had a panic attack sitting at the desk in front of the video camera, the judge, attorney and another lady.  I had to go to the ER earlier that month from bad panic.  Had to use a wheelchair because I almost passed out at the registration desk.  I'm worse off now than I was then.

[[Be...]]

there are alot of mean ppl. out there in the world, Maymay.  I've been abused tremendously by so many.  That's why it's nice to meet you, because I can tell you are so kind. 

[[Ma...]]

Your story is so sad. You are so hyper-vigilant. I hope this symptom goes away very soon. It's been to long.

 

Thank you for saying I'm nice. I really think your nice too. That's why you deserve none of this.

[[Be...]]

Every single day as soon as I drag myself out of bed at noon, it's non-stop panic, breathing problems, fear, shaking, trembling, vertigo, body pain.  I have so much to deal with here on my own and can't handle it.  This is way beyond PTSD.