Things seem to be getting better for me

[[Te...]]

I just thought I would check in here, and let people know how I am doing.  It has been six weeks of withdrawal, and about 8-9 weeks (not sure exactly) since my last use of Valium.  I went cold turkey because I had no idea that there would be any withdrawal symptoms -- I was only on the Valium for three months.  At first, I thought my symptoms were due to oxycodone, which I was also taking, but now I know better.

 

In the middle of last week, I started to get some relief from the constant "nervous breakdown mode".  When I was in that mode, I couldn't even consider doing any real work.  Small tasks seemed utterly overwhelming.  But starting about a week ago, that started to lift.  I still have serious brain fog and memory impairment, and am feeling depressed for a lot of the day, but that's leaps and bounds above where I was.

 

I'm taking medical leave, and am scheduled to go back to work on January 2nd -- two weeks away.  I'm also taking a graduate level class, and my professor agreed to give me an "I" and give me four extra weeks to work on that.  I managed to do one assignment today, even though I feel like crap.

 

In summary, my days right now are more like run-of-the-mill crappy days, rather than tortures-of-the-damned days from hell.

 

I really appreciate you all being here, and reading the stories.  I am hopeful, though, that my withdrawals don't last for months and months. Anyone going through these for that length of time has my profound admiration and sympathy.  I do believe that we can all heal if we stay strong and stay clean.

[[Ba...]]

This is such an interesting and uplifting post. Thanks

[[Ro...]]

Keep the hope lifted, we will come out from this misery for good.

[[sc...]]

Hello Ted, welcome,,what dose of valium were you on when you jumped?

[[be...]]

You will only continue to heal. I am so happy to read that your days of torture are behind you!

[[Te...]]

I was taking 5 mg tablets anywhere from three to six a day for about three months.  I got them off the Internet and wasn't under a doctor's supervision.

 

Today was pretty bad again unfortunately.  I felt nauseous and had no appetite,  could only drink a smoothie,  had a headache and brain fog,  and general malaise - pretty bad,  but nowhere near as bad as it was at its worse.

 

I just took a nap and now feel a lot better. Mornings are always worse than evenings. I've read here that recovery is not linear,  so I'm going to just try to hold on to the fact that the windows are a sign that my brain is healing.

[[Te...]]

I thought I'd come back to this thread for an update.  I see that I wrote on 12/19 that I was starting to feel worse again.  Unfortunately, that was just the beginning of a slide back into hell.  I felt unbelievably awful throughout the holidays. The symptoms got to be just as bad as they were in the first week when all this started, back in the beginning of November. Plus, they had an added dimension: unrelenting nausea.  I've had to extend my medical leave by three more weeks.

 

My doctor told me that he no longer believes that this is benzo withdrawal, and he said he has a lot of experience (I believe him). He said that the phenobarbital should have gotten rid of those symptoms, and that they shouldn't have started to go away and then come raging back like they did.

 

So, now I don't know what to think.  The bright side is that the last couple of days, I have started to feel better again.  The waves of bad symptoms come and go every day in the same way:  they start in the morning, peak around noon, and then start to gradually go away, and usually by the evening I feel fine.  The last week or so, the waves have been getting noticeably shorter every day, contracting from both ends: I don't start to feel bad until later every morning; and I start to feel better earlier and earlier every day.  Today, I only felt really bad for about three hours around noon.  And, the symptoms were noticeably milder.

 

So, my plan is to continue to put more and more time under my belt without being on any drugs except the Lexapro, and to hold on and hope that I continue to improve.  I did see a neurologist yesterday, and he ordered an MRI and an EEG, but he was pretty sure that my symptoms were just "chemical", and not because of some brain disease or injury.

[[Je...]]

That is about how my withdrawal is going...feel better one day and then have a horrible day after that.

It is quite the roller coaster.

 

Mornings are okay for me,but going out in public really sends me into a panic.I start sweating,and feeling dizzy.

The worst symptom for me is that feeling that things in my vision are "moving" when they are not.

I feel like every one knows and is looking at me like I'm a crack head or something. 

 

 

 

 

 

[[Ba...]]

I'm the same way Jewey,every other day. That's good news for me because tomorrow should be a lot better

[[Mo...]]

So your not on the pheno anymore?

[[Ba...]]

Mommy,  Are you asking me?

 

I was on it for several weeks this summer as I tapered up , held a little, and then tapered off.

[[Mo...]]

No I was asking TED 

[[GL...]]

29 months out ct wtf why am t not getting better

[[Te...]]

Yes, I've been off the phenobarbital for three days now.  Today was about the same as yesterday -- symptoms seem to be easing up, but still definitely not out of the woods yet.

[Guest [ma...]]

I thought I'd come back to this thread for an update.  I see that I wrote on 12/19 that I was starting to feel worse again.  Unfortunately, that was just the beginning of a slide back into hell.  I felt unbelievably awful throughout the holidays. The symptoms got to be just as bad as they were in the first week when all this started, back in the beginning of November. Plus, they had an added dimension: unrelenting nausea.  I've had to extend my medical leave by three more weeks.

 

My doctor told me that he no longer believes that this is benzo withdrawal, and he said he has a lot of experience (I believe him). He said that the phenobarbital should have gotten rid of those symptoms, and that they shouldn't have started to go away and then come raging back like they did.

 

So, now I don't know what to think.  The bright side is that the last couple of days, I have started to feel better again.  The waves of bad symptoms come and go every day in the same way:  they start in the morning, peak around noon, and then start to gradually go away, and usually by the evening I feel fine.  The last week or so, the waves have been getting noticeably shorter every day, contracting from both ends: I don't start to feel bad until later every morning; and I start to feel better earlier and earlier every day.  Today, I only felt really bad for about three hours around noon.  And, the symptoms were noticeably milder.

 

 

I feel compelled to say that I feel your doctor is very uninformed. Phenobarb acts on the GABA/a receptors just like Valium does, but it acts on a different subunit of those receptors. Phenobarb has an extremely long half life of approx 96 hours, but the half life can range from 2 to 7 days. Phenobarb does not get "rid of" the benzo w/d symptoms. The phenobarb temorarily masks the w/d from the benzos until it's removed.

 

As far as your symptoms going away and coming back, that is very typical of w/d and recovery from benzos for many people. However when one looks at your signature, there is a direct correlation between your decrease in the dose of Phenobarb, and the timing of the increase or worsening of your w/d symptoms. You were barely on PB long enough for it to reach steady state in your body and then you began to decrease your dose. 5 days after you tapered down to 120 mg, things began to worsen.

 

The good news is that you were only on Valium for 3 months. That is however plenty long enough for some people to become dependent on benzos,  and to experience significant w/d. I wish you the best with your healing and I hope it's a speedy recovery.

 

I am sure you have read the Ashton Manual and other resources but I encourage you to read up on phenobarb as well. Take care, mandala

 

[[so...]]

I had horrible nausea during tolerance and acute withdrawal.  I took Zofran 4 mg.  Every 4 hours.

[[Te...]]

Did the Zofran help you?  I took Zofran twice, and it didn't seem to help at all, so I stopped.

 

I'm still not out of the woods, and my w/d (if that's what these symptoms are) is still going up and down like a roller-coaster.  Mornings are still hell, but by the afternoons/evenings, I feel almost normal. I'm going to try starting back to work part-time next week.

[[so...]]

The Zfran helped for almost a year of opiates and gabapentin tolerance and withdrawal.  I stopped taking it in November when I jumped off gabapentin.  Was pretty much afraid to take ANY pills including supplements I kept trying to ease my symptoms.  What a waste of money.  Wish we had a thrift store on this forum.  I'd donate all my unopened bottles.