Got to sleep relaxed and then wake up terrified

[[So...]]

I'm 6 and a half months out.  I fell asleep last night and was quite relaxed.  Woke up this morning with such a sense of dread and doom.  I'm being brought back to anxious memories from my past.  I've tried to "control" my anxious thoughts for many years and as we know, this doesn't work.  Accepting them is the way out.

 

When the anxiety returns after a calm period, I feel like a failure and believe that there's something seriously wrong with me.  If I were "normal", the anxiety would stop returning and I'd have control over it.

 

I'm hoping some of you can relate.   

 

Would appreciate some encouragement.  Thanks.

[Guest [Mi...]]

Hi, SoCaler.

 

I'm about 5 months out now, and every now and then, I wake up with a return of what I call "morning terrors." I try to remind myself that it's nothing compared to the morning terrors I had during withdrawal and into acute.

 

That seems to help because it's a reminder that I'm healing.

 

Is this a new s/x for you?

 

I can definitely relate, but it does get better. 

[[co...]]

What you are describing is par for the course; congratulation for becoming med free!  It's a hard slog for some of us, but worth it!  Learning to sit with the discomfort/distracting are good coping strategies.  Mornings will be tough for awhile, hang in there!  Those thoughts are the meds wanting you back, not you.

[[So...]]

Thanks MindSeeker and Cookienose.  I've had the morning terrors ever since I jumped off Xanax.  Today was one of those days I panicked when the scary thoughts came and you know how that spirals down.  I beat myself up terribly.

 

The other factor that could be playing a part is that I'm transitioning off the Cymbalta I've been on over 7 years.  Doc believes that is causing some of my issues and is moving me to Celexa.  My goal is to wean off all this stuff someday. 

[Guest [Mi...]]

Thanks MindSeeker and Cookienose.  I've had the morning terrors ever since I jumped off Xanax.  Today was one of those days I panicked when the scary thoughts came and you know how that spirals down.  I beat myself up terribly.

 

The other factor that could be playing a part is that I'm transitioning off the Cymbalta I've been on over 7 years.  Doc believes that is causing some of my issues and is moving me to Celexa.  My goal is to wean off all this stuff someday.

 

Yeah, withdrawal from all psychiatric meds can cause these types of symptoms.

 

Hope you're feeling better soon. My goal is to be medication free, too. 

[[So...]]

Thanks for the reassurance,  Mind. I need it.  I feel like a scared little kid inside.

[[Wi...]]

Cortisol is at it's highest in the early morning.  It has nothing to do with it being your failure.  What you are experiencing is a physiological chemical occurrence that causes distressing thoughts and feelings of doom and while miserable, it isn't a statement about you, it's just something that's happening to you and it does pass in time.

 

WWWI

[[So...]]

Thanks WWW, I need that reminder often at the moment.

[[...]]

Hi I have been off ativan for about six months and I'm going through the exact same thing. It's like my brain won't let me get over the terrible things my body and mind felt during withdrawal.  It makes me feel like I'm crazy and should be punished.  I know it sounds crazy but I'm praying so hard that it gets better hope u have a good day.

[[Ca...]]

I'm having some of the same struggles. I woke up at 5am w/ shakes & adrenaline rushes... Then the thoughts started. I've just been upset all day but I keep reminding myself that I'm one day closer to being healed. You are too. We will get through this.