Just really sad i CT - maybe i should reinstate and taper?

[[Pi...]]

Basically cant leave my bed.. Cant go out or meet people because i get intrusive thoughts.. And i hate staying in bc i get tremendously lonely.. Theres nowhere to run..

 

And i keep thinking i might stay like this for 4 years since i cold turkeyed and ppl here say ct makes wd last so much longer..

 

Really need some help and advice guys, since my doctor says protracted benzo wd doesnt exist.. Idk what to do..

 

Hugs

[Guest [Mi...]]

Nope, there's really nowhere to run, unfortunately. And I've yet to meet a pdoc in the past 30 years who believed the medications are dangerous to the extent of us being sick for this long.

 

You've had some good windows along the way, right? I remember reading about you getting out some?

 

Can you watch tv or listen to music? You know what we say around here: distract, distract, distract.

 

You're so young, PK. You're going to beat this and have a wonderful life. Hang in there. 

[[ma...]]

Check out this page PK http://www.benzosupport.org/withdrawal_and_recovery.htm and scroll down to the methods and recovery section and you will see that the average cold turkey recovery time is 17 months and if you add the fact you are young, you should be nearly there in a few months

 

I can only guess that you're having such a bad time because you were on a massive amount of benzos - I've just checked the benzo comparison chart and 8mg of K is like 160mg of Valium :/

[[bi...]]

Well we all know there is withdrawal.  If you can try to stay off.  I came off klonopin and it is very rough. 

 

[[Pi...]]

Thank you guys, specially maximillian. I loved that link, just what i needed right now..

 

But i worry.. Does dosage size matter? Bc with 8 mg k i might also take 4 years to heal.. And that makes it worth to reinstate and slowly taper.. (12 month taper + 16 months wd is less than 4 years)

[[Te...]]

I hope you don't reinstate and start tapering, PK. I can only think that in the end you'd end up wishing you hadn't done it. You'd be faced with an even longer journey. You're young. You may bounce back a lot quicker. You may not even realize that you're close to some better times. I know you've been through this for a long time. Keep going and don't give up. As you said, the reward is your life back.

[[ma...]]

I don't think it makes a massive amount on difference, it will probably effect the intensity of withdrawal but not so much length, I'd say a few months more but defo not another 2 years. I think the key factors of a very long withdrawal are age, how many withdrawals experienced and length of time of benzos. The general opinion is that reinstating does not work and will only lead to kindling and therefore you'll just have a worse and longer withdrawal next time :/

 

My advice is you just hunker down, get some DVDs on, lots of crisps, see friends, make plans for Christmas and New Year's Eve and stay positive - I've just been planning a few nights out/shopping trips with friends and I feel quite good

[[ma...]]

Check out this link too http://www.benzosupport.org/recovery_time_by_age.htm although it says the average withdrawal for 20-29 year olds is 7.4 months it says at the bottom that no 20-29 year old took over 20 months to recover

[[Co...]]

The only time I think one might have a chance of reinstating is if you were fine on the pills last time. Pity, you'd probably have to go back on a massive amount. To really taper without having bad sx and an easy jump is to do daily liquid micro titration. I know someone who is doing just that but she still has a ways to go. It takes a long time but she is relatively sx free. When I get desperate, like now, I want to reinstate but I know it will suck for me. The meds had a paradoxical effect on me the lower I got. It was awful! I'd just stay the course dude.

[[hu...]]

If you're not kindled, you have a better chance of faster recovery, personal experience. I'm kindled several times and the first couple cold turkeys weren't as horrible as this time for me.

[[Pi...]]

thanks max! just checked the link out. hope its true

 

idk if im kindled.. i quit ct for like 10 days then reinstated back in 2013.. does that count as rekindling?

[[hu...]]

I would say a gap of a month or more would be more likely to cause kindling. Klonopin has a long half life so in 10 days it was probably not completely washed out of your system before you reinstated.  I wouldn't consider it kindling, hopefully others might add more about what they think is the gap to cause kindling.

 

 

 

 

[[Pi...]]

Hope i didnt kindle

[Guest [mu...]]

Slow tapers do not guarantee an easy recovery. I tapered for 11 months (with tiny 3% reductions for the last .5 mg), and my post-taper withdrawal experience has been horrific. Reinstating at this point could be devastating. Just hold on, and eventually things will start to get easier.

[[Te...]]

Hey PK,

  Ashton puts a two week space between c/t and reinstating, so you're well within that time frame.

H.  A.    N.    G.    on, it's coming. Thanks for sharing your journey.        m