Should I reinstate?

[[je...]]

I have been off a high dose of Xanax (8-10mg daily) for ten weeks now. I am having a very hard time with w/d. I am not able to work or drive a car. I feel like I am losing my mind and the fear has been debilitating. I am thinking of reinstating some Xanax. I have been told this would be horrible or it might help. I nee some advice. I don't want to make things worse but I also want my life back.

[[ru...]]

Jet, I gave you my opinion in your other post. Some agree, some don't. You should really contact your doctor if you are suffering so badly that you feel your life has been lost.

 

You were taking an extremely large dose of Xanax for quite some time. What you are feeling is normal given you had no proper taper. You will have to way out your options and decide. It's easy for someone on the internet to tell you, no don't reinstate. But you are the one that has to live your life, if it's intolerable, then tell your doctor to help you with a proper taper.

 

Don't feel like a failure, just do what helps you get through this in a safe fashion. And again, if you do reinstate, I did say Valium would be my choice to taper from, Dr. Ashton has many people cross from Xanax and succeed.

 

Take care.

 

[[So...]]

This is such a tough call. Because sometimes reinstatments dont work. And in my case the withdrawal the second time was a LOT harder than the first and this is called kindling. If you think you can ride it out and let time pass, eventually your brain will rewire. But it takes time and your gonna be dysfunctional for a while. Reinstatement is a risk, but many BB's have done it and then very slowly tapered off. There is no clear answer as it's so individual. I hope you find the right answer for you.

[[ma...]]

I'd talk to my doctor if I was you.

[[be...]]

I too stopped a large dose of benzodiazepines suddenly. I was on 8 mg of Ativan, which is the equivalent of your xanax dose. The first few months were horrific. The mental torment was excruciating.  I thought I was losing my mind. I thought I was going insane. I lived in a nightmare. Around the third month my symptoms began to lessen. Each month after that I got better and better. I am just shy of one year and I am fully healed. I personally would not reinstate. It comes with too many risks. There is no guarantee things will get better and if you ever want to get off of them again you might risk kindling, where each subsequent withdrawal is worse than the previous one. I have read few successful stories in regards to reinstatement and many from those with deep regret.

[[je...]]

I am seeing my doctor tomorrow to discuss this. I am really not sure what to do. I do know that if I don't get back to work soon I will lose my job and health insurance. I wish that was not a factor but it is.

 

There are two other big factors for me. I was on a very high dose of Xanax for a long time and I c/t off it instead of being tapered. How much Valium would I have to take to equal the amount of Xanax I took? I am very afraid that I would have tolerance and be in a worse situation. On the other hand I am also afraid I will lose my job. income, health insurance and mind!

[[ba...]]

hi jethaze i quit xanax 2 months + `1 week ago, it was difficult dealing with the worst side affects in the first 2 weeks for me, um when i felt my worst i went on a walk just a simple 5 minute walk cleared up my head alot if you can try this out you can just walk around inside your house i used a treadmill

[[Be...]]

Jethaze,

 

I wish I could take away your suffering and despair. If you feel you can't go on like this, do you think you have it within you to follow a really slow tapering plan? Ashton Manual link here http://www.benzo.org.uk/manual/bzsched.htm for equivalencies and tapering plans. No work or health insurance would make matters worse, unless you have friends, family or some other scenario as a safety net. Can you imagine what the least bad scenario would be for getting through this?

 

With compassion,

Benniejets

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[[Ch...]]

Hi Jethaze,

 

Here are two really good bits of writing for you to read and think over, maybe print for yourself or your doctor:

 

Reinstatement, updosing

 

A dilemma faced by some people in the process of benzodiazepine withdrawal, or after withdrawal, is what to do if they have intolerable symptoms which do not lessen after many weeks. If they are still taking benzodiazepines, should they increase the dose? If they have already withdrawn, should they reinstate benzodiazepines and start the withdrawal process again? This is a difficult situation which, like all benzodiazepine problems, depends to some degree on the circumstances and the individual, and there are no hard and fast rules.

 

Reinstatement after withdrawal? Many benzodiazepine users who find themselves in this position have withdrawn too quickly; some have undergone 'cold turkey'. They think that if they go back on benzodiazepines and start over again on a slower schedule they will be more successful. Unfortunately, things are not so simple. For reasons that are not clear, (but perhaps because the original experience of withdrawal has already sensitised the nervous system and heightened the level of anxiety) the original benzodiazepine dose often does not work the second time round. Some may find that only a higher dose partially alleviates their symptoms, and then they still have to go through a long withdrawal process again, which again may not be symptom-free.

Updosing during withdrawal? Some people hit a "sticky patch" during the course of benzodiazepine withdrawal. In many cases, staying on the same dose for a longer period (not more than a few weeks) before resuming the withdrawal schedule allows them to overcome this obstacle. However, increasing the dose until a longed-for plateau of 'stability' arrives is not a good strategy. The truth is that one never 'stabilises' on a given dose of benzodiazepine. The dose may be stable but withdrawal symptoms are not. It is better to grit one's teeth and continue the withdrawal. True recovery cannot really start until the drug is out of the system.

 

Pharmacologically, neither reinstating nor updosing is really rational. If withdrawal symptoms are still present, it means that the GABA/benzodiazepine receptors have not fully recovered (see above). Further benzodiazepines cause further down-regulation, strengthen the dependence, prolong withdrawal, delay recovery and may lead to protracted symptoms. In general, the longer the person remains on benzodiazepines the more difficult it is to withdraw. On the whole, anyone who remained benzodiazepine-free, or has remained on the same dose, for a number of weeks or months would be ill-advised to start again or to increase dosage. It would be better to devote the brain to solving individual symptoms and to finding sources of advice and support. Advice about how to deal with individual symptoms is given in the Manual (Chapter 3).

 

 

 

Recovery Tips

 

1. Recovery from bei ng an accidental addict to benzodiazepines is serious business. It takes time for the central nervous system to heal and for neurotransmitters to stop being sensitive. None of us had the faintest idea that this kind of situation lay in front of us. So we are dealing with shock at what has happened as well as the real physical and mental/emotional symptoms of withdrawal.

 

2. Recovery is not linear, as it is with other illnesses or injuries. If we cut our hands, we can actually see the cut heal and the pain diminish over time. In benzo withdrawal we can be well one day and very sick the next. This is normal and we have to look at our healing differently.

 

3. Recovery is an individual thing, and it is difficult to predict how quickly symptoms will stop for good. People expect to be completely better after a certain period of time, and often get discouraged and depressed when they feel this time has passed and they are not completely better. Most patient support programs tell clients to anticipate 6 months to a year for recovery after a taper has ended. But some people feel better a few months after they stop taking benzos; for others it takes more than a year to feel completely better. Try not to be obsessed with how long it will take, because every day you stay off benzos, your body is healing at its own rate. If you do not follow this particular schedule, it does not mean there is something wrong or you are not healing. Even if you are feeling ill in some respects, other symptoms may disappear. Even people in difficult tapers see improvements in symptoms very early on. So don’t let these time-frames scare you. The way you feel at one month will not be how you will be feeling at three months or at six months.

 

4. It is very typical to have setbacks at different points of time (these times can vary). These setbacks can be so intense that people feel their healing hasn’t happened at all; they feel they have been taken right back to beginning. Setbacks, if they occur, are a normal part of recovery.

 

5. When people are in recovery, they have a lot of fears. One is that they will never get better. Another is that their symptoms are really what they are like — perhaps what they have always been like. Both of these fears are stimulated by benzo withdrawal. In other words they are the thought components of benzo withdrawal, just as insomnia is a physical component.

 

6. There is no way around benzo withdrawal and recovery—you have to go through it. People try all sorts of measures to try to make the pain stop, but nothing can shortcut the process. Our body and brain have their own agenda for healing, and it will take place if you simply accept it.

 

7. When you are having a bad spell, healing is still going on. People typically find that after a bad spell, symptoms improve and often go away forever. Try to remember this when times are hard.

 

8. There is no magic cure to recovery, but you can help yourself by comforting and reassuring yourself as much as possible. Read reassuring information, stay away from stress, ask your partner, family and others for reassurance, and go back to the things you did at the beginning if you are experiencing really tough symptoms.

 

9. When we start to feel better, it is very typical to try to do too much. We are grateful to be alive and we have energy for the first time in weeks or months. But this can be a dangerous time. When we do to much and take on too much too early, it re-sensitizes the nervous system. It doesn’t prevent healing in the long term, but it can make us feel discouraged. So try to pace yourself, even if you are feeling good.

 

10. You do need to respect your body during recovery, although you don’t need to make drastic changes to your lifestyle. Exercise, in any form is critical—even if you can only walk around the house or to the end of the block. Eating well and avoiding all stimulants is crucial. Regular high-protein snacks can help with the shakes and the feelings of weakness we have during withdrawal and recovery.

 

11. Recovery is all about acceptance, but this does not mean passive acceptance. Set small goals for yourself that are achievable. Try to keep exercise happening. Work at your recovery even if that means accepting you are sick—for now. You wouldn’t be hard on yourself if you were in a traffic accident and had injuries; you would work at rehab. Try to take the same attitude and approach to benzodiazepine withdrawal.

 

 

 

Hope this info helps a tiny bit...

Challis 

[[je...]]

I have a lot to think about. Thank you all for your feedback. I will talk to my doctor tomorrow and see what he thinks.

[[ke...]]

Hang in there. The reinstatement might not help and then you will be truly screwed.

[[be...]]

Hang in there. The reinstatement might not help and then you will be truly screwed.

 

I agree with most of the posters. I just wish I had enough balls to hang tough with my C/T instead of reinstating. If so, I would not be here, but looking for the next great job ahead of me.

[[je...]]

After much thought I have decided it is not a good idea to reinstate. I want to thank all of you that gave me feedback. I would be a liar if I said I wasn't afraid of what the next few months will bring but I am going to tough it out. I will most likely been leaning on all of you for support and to answer questions for me. I am really glad I found benzo buddies.

[[Ch...]]

After much thought I have decided it is not a good idea to reinstate. I want to thank all of you that gave me feedback. I would be a liar if I said I wasn't afraid of what the next few months will bring but I am going to tough it out. I will most likely been leaning on all of you for support and to answer questions for me. I am really glad I found benzo buddies.

 

We're here for you, jethaze. 

[[Be...]]

After much thought I have decided it is not a good idea to reinstate. I want to thank all of you that gave me feedback. I would be a liar if I said I wasn't afraid of what the next few months will bring but I am going to tough it out. I will most likely been leaning on all of you for support and to answer questions for me. I am really glad I found benzo buddies.

 

Lean away, jethaze!

 

Benniejets

[[Fl...]]

That's a huge amount of Seroquel you are taking.  How does it affect you?  I take 25 mgs at night to help with sleep.  I hope you get some windows soon.

[[Al...]]

Hang in there. The reinstatement might not help and then you will be truly screwed.

 

This is my case now .

[[je...]]

Flicka - the 300mg that I take at night really helps me to sleep. I have backed off the Seroquel I take during the day. I have been having a hard time with dizziness so I want to see if it related to the drug or it is just withdrawal.

 

Alex 23 - I am so sorry to hear things have gotten worse for you. Please know you are not alone and support is here for you. Keep reaching out. There are so many good people on this site.

 

Last night was a bad night for me. I got wrapped up in reading all I could about benzo withdrawal all over the web. It is good to me informed but sometimes I work myself up.  I find that I am my own worse enemy when it comes to controlling my fear. I really need to distract myself more often. I find that if I don't the fear builds up to a breaking point.

 

What things do other people do to deal with the fear?

[[Be...]]

Jethaze,

Cut myself off from binging on withdrawal info last night. Decided to distract myself with the issue that  led to Benzo use to begin with: Fear and anxiety. I found this guys website last night. Anxietyguru.com. I don't agree with everything he has to say, but its more potent, practical advice than any of the other the canned sites out there. At least when it comes to the head games we get into. His perspective comes out of dealing with his own issues. My heart rate had been at 100 for hours. After reading some of his stuff, it went down to 87. That was hopeful. So, that wasn't a bad distraction.

 

There's my two bits.

BJ

[[je...]]

I found out that if I don't return to work after Christmas I am going to be let go. I have already been off 11 weeks without pay. The bills are starting to pile up. Right now my symptoms are extremely bad. The fear inside me won't let up. I haven't had any windows. I am seeing my neurologist tomorrow and my main doctor Tuesday. I need to discuss with both of them about reinstating some Valium so I can reclaim my life. Ir eally don't know what else to do. I can't afford to go without health insurance and there is now way I can lose my job. I wish things were different. I am very scared.

[[Be...]]

I am very sorry to hear about your dilemma, Jethaze. I hope your docs can give you some insight. Mostly, I'm praying you suffer less. If you reinstate, the question would be, could you manage the work? I suppose I'm not saying anything you haven't already questioned on your own.

 

Reaching out,

Benniejets

[[je...]]

I am in a bad situation. My only family is my brother in San Diego and as soon as he found out I was in the hospital for xanax issues he stopped talking to me. It has been over two months with no word from him. My partner is not talking to me and refuses to take me to doctor appointments. They say I am to blame for this situation I am in. My brother told me he wouldn't be surprised if I have brain damage. I have no one to learn on in what is the hardest struggle of my life. My friends think I am weak. Some of them have told me they think I am exaggerating my symptoms and it is not that bad.

 

I honestly have no support in my life right now. I am facing that along with financial disaster and a health situation that is chronic.

[[Fl...]]

:'(

[[la...]]

Jethaze,

So sorry to hear about your partner and family. Maybe of they read Ashton manual? or something that explains benzo withdrawal? I have a sister who stopped talking to me and one that Cted. But I am lucky to have a brother that cares.

 

Do not blame yourself! You must take care of yourself as best as you can!

 

It is so frustrating that one only has to Google benzo withdrawal to easily learn about it.