Really Starting to Lose Hope the Tinnitus will ever leave

[[Se...]]

It's been months.  I don't even really count anymore.  The tinnitus never stops.  On occasion, it seems to quiet for a bit, then rears its monstrous head again, full force.  Other symptoms come and go.  Not the tinnitus.

 

While I do visualize myself recovered at some point in the future, for some reason, I think it might be a partial recovery, due to the tinnitus.  It seems to be an extremely sticky symptom and nobody seems to even know how and why it happens in benzo w/d.  :'(  I can take every other symptom, but the ear hissing... I can't even continue to talk about it; think I've said it all.  It's what drove me to try and end my life in the summer.  I'm still here, living in some alternate universe.  And so is the tinnitus.

 

Unfortunately, I am one of the folks for whom habituating to the sounds would be incredibly difficult, if I can at all.  I am so angry that my quality of life is so low, due to the head sounds.  This makes me feel the absolute worst about this whole unfortunate saga.  I always think of my two wonderful kids, and how this effing drug has robbed them of their wonderful mom. 

 

Yes... I've gone to the tinnitus thread, but of course there is no relief to be found anywhere.

 

Thanks for the vent, I guess.  It didn't help me much, but I've put it out there, for what it's worth.

[Guest [ma...]]

Hi Serentiy,

 

I am so sorry about the tinnitus. I went through the same thing but it's getting a lot better now. I actually developed tinnitus in 1998 and that was one of the reasons I began taking Gravol for sleep. The T worsened terribly after the K c/t and then of course the same afer being reinstated and stopping all drugs in 2012. I thought just like you that I would not be able to carry on. The T was so loud that it caused my ears to hurt. Just like you it was non stop and worsened with the head pressure. Also every time I was jolted awake the T would be worse.

 

There is a direct connection between adrenaline levels and T. I have also read about a direct connection with increased T and elevated Glutamate levels. As my adrenaline and glutamate levels began decrease, and when I began to get windows the T started to become quieter. A wave always began with increased head pressure and T and stopped with quieter T and no head pressure.

 

I want to try and reassure you that even though it make take longer things will calm down for you. Please remain hopeful. Most days now I am rarely aware of any sound of high pitched screaming T in my head and on those days it's not quiet it's actually better than it was 16 years ago.

 

Take good care, mandala

 

 

[[Po...]]

I have har tinnitus, hyperacusis and ear pressure for about six weeks now. It has been very tough. I have also thought that it makes my quality of life so bad that I don't know if I want to live anymore. These thoughts have arisen almost daily. However, I still hope it will get manageable. Those days or moments it's quiter I feel relieved. I try to think that there is hope. I have now use of masking sounds, they all irritate me because of the hyperacusis. But the hope is always there. This has been a tough turn. I feel it has something to do with sensitivities, I have got others, too.

[[La...]]

Hi,

I have relentless tinnitus (hissing) in my left ear too. I've had it for years now. For me, it's irritating and I hate it, but it doesn't affect my functioning like the boaty dizziness does. I can't walk, sit or lie down comfortably because of that, and it too is related to the ears. I keep thinking that if the dizziness goes away but the tinnitus remains, I'll be thankful that I can walk again. I'm not sure if that helps anyone else, though. It's about how much suffering and what kind of suffering each one of us is enduring. My dizziness leads to intense foot and muscle pain (exhausted leg muscles from trying not to fall combined with a foot condition), but the tinnitus doesn't affect my general function in the same way. I guess it's about perception.

[Guest [ma...]]

Hi,

I have relentless tinnitus (hissing) in my left ear too. I've had it for years now. For me, it's irritating and I hate it, but it doesn't affect my functioning like the boaty dizziness does. I can't walk, sit or lie down comfortably because of that, and it too is related to the ears. I keep thinking that if the dizziness goes away but the tinnitus remains, I'll be thankful that I can walk again. I'm not sure if that helps anyone else, though. It's about how much suffering and what kind of suffering each one of us is enduring. My dizziness leads to intense foot and muscle pain (exhausted leg muscles from trying not to fall combined with a foot condition), but the tinnitus doesn't affect my general function in the same way. I guess it's about perception.

 

Hi Lapis just read your post about the dizziness. BB member Hopeful-One had that quiet badly too. She might be a good person to talk to? I am sure she would be more than willing to share her experiences regarding that symptom. Just a thought. Take care, mandala

[[La...]]

Thanks, Mandala. There's been a long-running thread called "floaty boat", so I was reading and posting quite attentively there. Thank you for being so supportive.

 

I'm trying to stay hopeful. I have read that it goes away, but I'm on the verge of 18 months off, plus 2 years of dizziness during which the cause of the problem was unclear. It was the meds all along. So that makes 3.5 years. I'm completely spent. But it does help to see that others survive. I haven't seen others with foot problems as well as the dizziness (plus the tinnitus!), so I think I'm alone on that one. The dizziness makes the pain unbearable, but like the tinnitus, it doesn't seem that there a lot of choices here. I'd love to find a miracle cure but in lieu of that, there's time.

 

Since balance and tinnitus are both related to the ear, I'm hoping they'll both go away with time. The meds are considered "ototoxic", and when I had an ear exam a few years ago, the audiologist pulled out a big book with all the medications listed that can cause ear problems. It was a HUGE book!