Reason to recover?

[[...]]

My morning anxiety has gotten worse the past couple of days. I wake up around 5 am and start thinking my life is over. Day in and day out that's all I think about. I feel like I am wasting my life. It's gonna take X amount of months or years to get better. Life wasted. I am going to quit my job because it stresses me out and I'll have to go back to school and waste some more time and get older and older and have nothing to show for it.

 

I am 37 years old but I feel like I have nothing to look forward to. I have few people in my life and have always had trouble making friends.  I just started cbt but my mind is so messed up I don't think it will help.  What is the point in healing if your life is gonna suck when you are done?

 

Sorry for the complaining  :'(

[Guest [Or...]]

My morning anxiety has gotten worse the past couple of days. I wake up around 5 am and start thinking my life is over. Day in and day out that's all I think about. I feel like I am wasting my life. It's gonna take X amount of months or years to get better. Life wasted. I am going to quit my job because it stresses me out and I'll have to go back to school and waste some more time and get older and older and have nothing to show for it.

 

I am 37 years old but I feel like I have nothing to look forward to. I have few people in my life and have always had trouble making friends.  I just started cbt but my mind is so messed up I don't think it will help.  What is the point in healing if your life is gonna suck when you are done?

 

Sorry for the complaining  :'(

 

I had that at your point off. Now my morning anxiety is manageable. It does get better as time goes on, I just think you become more frustrated as time goes on as well, making the symptoms seem worse. Hang in there! You can find new reasons to make life better.

[[Je...]]

Hey SMC!

 

You have a lot of negative thinking going on.  Have you talked to a therapist?  I used to see one three times a week until I got my anxiety and negative self talk under control and it is one of the main reasons that I am getting throught this.  It is hard to W/D when you have an underlying mental issue complicating and feeding the w/d symptoms.  You have to step up, realize your own self-worth, and look forward to the day in your future when you have attained all that you want and deserve.  You deserve a job you enjoy, a partner you love and friends and family around you.  You have to love yourself first and take control of this.  Seek help, get some exercise, eat right, and keep on fighting for the future that you deserve and the one that only YOU can attain for YOURSELF.

 

My heart goes out to you!  Take control.

[[co...]]

I hate it when someone goes on about 'negative' thinking!

 

You will get thru this, smc-it's a phase, time is your friend...just keep putting one foot in front of the other and one morning you will get up and find that one small thing will bring you joy, and you will feel a bit stronger and you will realize that 37 is not so old-you have much life ahead of you with many things to experience yet!

 

Things change-nothing stays the same...

[[ca...]]

That statement is true.  Nothing ever stays the same.  We change just as the seasons change.  I notice you are taking antidepressants and in my personal experience i felt the way you do while on them.  Ironically,  i was kept in that state for ten years when it was suppose to make me happy.  Initially, I had a sense of euphoria and not caring and then it was just ten years of not caring about anything.  I couldnt keep a job,  couldnt care less to make friends and spent most days playing video games and sleeping.  That was a constant state.  Now being off them i have little revelations where i think 'how the hell did i get here?  What happened to my life(which is a fog)'.  I feel this in benzo withdrawal but only difference is, is that its not a constant state.  It gradually gets better and you see glimpses of light.  Im sure A/Ds help in the meantime but just be aware that it can have that effect too.

[[ca...]]

Smc, come on your young and you have a whole life in front of you so choose to use it not waste it i could tell you about what i have been thru but i will not i do not want any sympathy or such but going to tell you i seen hell and back it was why i was on my dosage of Klonopin but and i say butt i chose to taper off this Poision and get back to where i am near normal again why because i apreciate life be it good or bad it`s life and it`s a gift so live it to it`s fullest.It is a gift not to be taken for granted or wasted ! Peace will be yours so seek it out and you will find it ! But not on these drugs you will not find anything and know what your feeling is not the real you!

[[be...]]

I remember those days of jolting awake at 4:30 in the morning, and then laying there with the feeling of impending doom. I was full of fear that wasn't attached to anything. Each day was the same. I spent my entire day absolutely consumed about my withdrawal and how badly my head felt. I simply existed. I had zero quality of life....but then things slowly got better. I am 11 months out now and completely healed. I know it seems like this nightmare will never end but it will. There will be a time when this is behind you.

[Guest [Or...]]

I remember those days of jolting awake at 4:30 in the morning, and then laying there with the feeling of impending doom. I was full of fear that wasn't attached to anything. Each day was the same. I spent my entire day absolutely consumed about my withdrawal and how badly my head felt. I simply existed. I had zero quality of life....but then things slowly got better. I am 11 months out now and completely healed. I know it seems like this nightmare will never end but it will. There will be a time when this is behind you.

 

Where's the success story, BRC?

[[ea...]]

You are only 37, and that's considered young these days. I know you feel old right now, old and used up. But that can be  part of withdrawal, for sure. It will pass. CBT might actually help, but if you don't feel you are up to it, maybe start it later on.

Everything you mention can be a part of withdrawal symptoms. Now is not the time to give up. You are only recently off a benzo, and still have bad symptoms. As time passes, you will start to feel better, more "normal." But for some of us, it does take time. So - don't give up now. You may turn a corner soon.

east

[[sw...]]

I know no one made me read this post. No one brought me to this forum but my own quest for information and guidance as I experience this most unpleasant experience called withdrawal. I was fortunate enough to meet a few rational folks who helped me through the worst of it. So I return after a while and I see this. And now I know why I cannot return.

 

My heart goes out to you because in the throes of w/d, our rationale and perception is completely distorted. But if you want people to sit here and say, "Don't worry, you have plenty to live for." or "C'mon it's not so bad." then you are fooling yourself. None of us really know you. Only you do. If your life sucks, then get better and find a way to unsuck it. This board is for those who are trying to cope with w/d's. If you think life isn't worth living even if all of your symptoms have been cured, then perhaps your problems run deeper than benzos.

 

BTW, I'm 43 and I'm dealing with the same thing. Age means nothing when it comes to this horror.

 

But thanks for teaching me a lesson...keep moving forward and don't let anyone drag you down. This will thankfully be my last post on this or any other forum related to benzos. This isn't a support group...it's a misery club. 

[Guest [Mi...]]

My morning anxiety has gotten worse the past couple of days. I wake up around 5 am and start thinking my life is over. Day in and day out that's all I think about. I feel like I am wasting my life. It's gonna take X amount of months or years to get better. Life wasted. I am going to quit my job because it stresses me out and I'll have to go back to school and waste some more time and get older and older and have nothing to show for it.

 

I am 37 years old but I feel like I have nothing to look forward to. I have few people in my life and have always had trouble making friends.  I just started cbt but my mind is so messed up I don't think it will help.  What is the point in healing if your life is gonna suck when you are done?

 

Sorry for the complaining  :'(

 

Hang in there, Smc. You're still very much in acute. I was so tired in acute I felt like I was 100 (I'm 46). But it's getting better.

 

Can you take some sick leave from work? Some companies offer short-term disability which could buy you a few weeks off.

 

You mentioned going back to school - at least some part of you is thinking about the future.

 

[[me...]]

I know no one made me read this post. No one brought me to this forum but my own quest for information and guidance as I experience this most unpleasant experience called withdrawal. I was fortunate enough to meet a few rational folks who helped me through the worst of it. So I return after a while and I see this. And now I know why I cannot return.

 

My heart goes out to you because in the throes of w/d, our rationale and perception is completely distorted. But if you want people to sit here and say, "Don't worry, you have plenty to live for." or "C'mon it's not so bad." then you are fooling yourself. None of us really know you. Only you do. If your life sucks, then get better and find a way to unsuck it. This board is for those who are trying to cope with w/d's. If you think life isn't worth living even if all of your symptoms have been cured, then perhaps your problems run deeper than benzos.

 

BTW, I'm 43 and I'm dealing with the same thing. Age means nothing when it comes to this horror.

 

But thanks for teaching me a lesson...keep moving forward and don't let anyone drag you down. This will thankfully be my last post on this or any other forum related to benzos. This isn't a support group...it's a misery club. 

 

Hello swervedriver,

 

This is an international forum which attracts people from all walks of life.  It's to be expected that we have a wide variety of responses to the stress and anxiety produced by withdrawal symptoms.  Feeling hopeless is common, but it's usually temporary.  Some of us verbalize these feelings and some don't.  But we are primarily here to support each other.  My suggestion to is that if you see posts that you don't like for whatever reason, it's better to not respond at all rather than to post an unsupportive  comment. This is from our Rules and Guidelines:

 

•Be polite towards, and respectful of, your fellow Buddies. We do not tolerate attacks upon fellow members. Any account created for the purposes of causing arguments and/or ill-feeling will be banned.

 

Thanks for understanding,

 

megan918

Senior Moderator

[[Mo...]]

I know no one made me read this post. No one brought me to this forum but my own quest for information and guidance as I experience this most unpleasant experience called withdrawal. I was fortunate enough to meet a few rational folks who helped me through the worst of it. So I return after a while and I see this. And now I know why I cannot return.

 

My heart goes out to you because in the throes of w/d, our rationale and perception is completely distorted. But if you want people to sit here and say, "Don't worry, you have plenty to live for." or "C'mon it's not so bad." then you are fooling yourself. None of us really know you. Only you do. If your life sucks, then get better and find a way to unsuck it. This board is for those who are trying to cope with w/d's. If you think life isn't worth living even if all of your symptoms have been cured, then perhaps your problems run deeper than

benzos.

 

BTW, I'm 43 and I'm dealing with the same thing. Age means nothing when it comes to this horror.

 

But thanks for teaching me a lesson...keep moving forward and don't let anyone drag you down. This will

thankfully be my last post on this or any other forum related to benzos. This isn't a support group...it's a misery club. 

 

misery club ? well, who do expect to meet here Juliea Roberts and Richard Gere ? 

[[ca...]]

Morreweg, ty for the laugh we need that on here from time to time and if anyone wants to know how easy W/D will be just ask your Doc who got ya on here  lmao ! Sorry i could not help myself

[[Mo...]]

Morreweg, ty for the laugh we need that on here from time to time and if anyone wants to know how easy W/D will be just ask your Doc who got ya on here  lmao ! Sorry i could not help myself

 

Yep can do  i couldn't help myself as well.

[[Lo...]]

My morning anxiety has gotten worse the past couple of days. I wake up around 5 am and start thinking my life is over. Day in and day out that's all I think about. I feel like I am wasting my life. It's gonna take X amount of months or years to get better. Life wasted. I am going to quit my job because it stresses me out and I'll have to go back to school and waste some more time and get older and older and have nothing to show for it.

 

I am 37 years old but I feel like I have nothing to look forward to. I have few people in my life and have always had trouble making friends.  I just started cbt but my mind is so messed up I don't think it will help.  What is the point in healing if your life is gonna suck when you are done?

 

Sorry for the complaining  :'(

 

complain away but don't get stuck there.  I'm 36 had to quit my job and now staying with my mom. i have never lived with my parents since i was 17. oh to top it i have 4 cats i lug around. still single.lol the friends i had really don't care that much about me. on the bright side. when i feel better. I'm so excited to live my life.  i wanna go back to school. i want to travel.  I'm gonna meet new people  who are healthy for me.don't give up man. its hard to feel anything good when we feel like this all the time. life will be better. life could be so much worse than it is. lets hang in there.

[[Ro...]]

All of you can give suggestions and advices but when you are depress is difficult to make your mind believe you will be ok one day. I face the same problem that Smc, even though my depression has come down in intensity I have days where I fell hopeless.

What I do is try to distract mostly watching tv and youtube videos.

It is true that saying that one pictures talks more than 1000 words; in youtube there are many videos of people who have recovered from this ordeal and it is comforting to hear their histories and see them taking about it, I found them more useful than the success histories in this forum as they are more impersonal.