I might look for inpatient help to get off Xanax.

[[Je...]]

Not sure I have the willpower to do it on my own. 

 

Thoughts?  I know you don't come out of there feeling great....

[[be...]]

Jerry:

 

I went through two horrific detoxes, one at the supposed world famous Cleveland Clinic, and came out there such a freaking mess that I had to reinstate. It's the same line with benzos. "Nobody understands just how horrible it is unless they go through the process themselves." If you think you are in bad pain now? Just wait and see how much more horrible it can be once you step inside the door. I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Bets

[[Mo...]]

Jerry , i agree with Betsy even though i have no taper experience. After my experience

and from what I've seen here , i would say inpatient at a Hospital for Benzo-detox

is a very bad card.

try to stay strong, easier said than done i know.

[[bu...]]

Bets- are you from Ohio? I live about 2 hours from the cleveland clinic.

[[sn...]]

Please do not go to be detoxed.  It will cause such a shock to your CNS and make recovery a hard road plus you would most likely have to reinstate.  It's a horrific experience.

[[Je...]]

I will have to stay on then.    I am not strong enough.  Sorry to be a disappointment.

[[Mo...]]

I will have to stay on then.    I am not strong enough.  Sorry to be a disappointment.

 

No disappointment, this is not a marathon.

want to share Alabamas response to someone , i though it was a good one.

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=119736.msg1572144#msg1572144

[[Je...]]

It's weird, because in the mornings I don't feel like I can do it.  In the evenings, I think I can.

 

Which me do I believe?

[[St...]]

I went to a 30-day rehab facility where I went essentially c/t.  The problem with going to "detox"/"rehab"/"inpatient" (whatever you call it) is that no matter how long you are there (in my case 30 days) you still have a loooong way to go with the healing after you get out.  It took a year and a whole lot of discipline (wanted to re-instate many times) for me to finally feel "out of the woods".

 

Looking back I'm OK with what I did because tapering on my own wasn't working.  Going to 30-day inpatient (and paying for it) gave me the determination to stay off benzos even with the hell I've gone though the past year.  I also learned some valuable information about addiction and coping skills (although looking back I believe my problem was physical dependence not addiction).

 

So, I don't know.  You seem to be in a similar situation I was in.  I think you should research and discuss all options (like you're doing) and ultimately you need to make the call for yourself.

 

Best of luck.  I'm sure you'll make it whatever direction you choose.

 

 

[[th...]]

My question is have you even had a recent cut? Have you even tried a small .0625mg or less cut to see what you feel? Or tried daily micro tapering? I don't hear of you even trying any of these options first. The truth is you might not feel any worse than you do now.

 

How can you make an educated decision without trying other options first? Even the V...you took it one time and made a decision based on that....any option needs a good month at least to see how it will work for you. Try a small cut or a daily taper before you jump into being ripped off ct. Holy crap...you think it's bad now....I can't imagine the torture that would do. Be smart about this!

 

G

[[lo...]]

I have thought about doing the same because my dose being so high and my doctor not wiling to work with me, but I have heard horror stories about rehab from friends. Heroin is a huge problem among well everyone almost I went to high school with so they all abuse pain killers and benzos, I only speak with a few of the people I knew the ones trying to get better one girl was addicted to benzos and pain killers and went to the Cleveland clinic as well I am from Dayton Ohio, and she came out is worse shape then before and is back using. I think the taper is the safest and healthiest way for mind and body to heal. I am so scared right now and I'm only on day five of my taper. I'm scared of my next cut, that I won't be able to do it, or I'll be alone and have a seizure. I try and keep myself positive and know that this is going to be a long hard road, but the hell I've lived on the xanax thinking I this is the only way this is my life. I owe it to myself to try and if my taper takes a year or 5, it's still less time then the 13 I have spent like this. the last year has been really bad, ad I think it is all due to the xanax.

 

I have thought about going to AA meetings, for support I don't talk to many people and my youngest son and my boyfriend just left until monday today so I am having a very hard time being alone right now.

 

I wish you the best and you know what is best for you.

[[ea...]]

Im going to take what I know is an unpopular stance on this.

For some people, going into a detox may just be their best plan. I cannot know if that is true for Jerryk or not, but it was for me.

I am not saying detox places are good....they aren't. Most don't know a thing about benzos, and it is, in reality, going cold turkey.

But - for some people, this may be the best way for them to get a start on being benzo-free. I know this because I was one of those people. I realize now that I could not have done a taper. I didn't even know I had a problem with my benzo! I was forced into a detox by a caring physician who DID see why I was going downhill. The detox I went into was awful, no doubt about it. I was ridiculed and called an "addict" by the staff. It was humiliating. BUT - it did force me to go off Klonapin, and I would not have done that on my own.

Each person has to evaluate themselves honestly to know how to proceed in benzo withdrawal. If a person is highly motivated, and trusts themselves enough, a taper is always going to be the best plan. But, if a person doubts they can do a taper, perhaps a detox is their best shot.

I have no doubt that without going into that horrible detox, I would have stayed on the benzo and probably would be long dead.

east

[[be...]]

Bets- are you from Ohio? I live about 2 hours from the cleveland clinic.

 

I lived in Ohio for 18 years and recently had to move back home due to benzo circumstances. It's complicated so I won't get into details. I lived in North Royalton, about 20 miles SW of downtown. And the CC is NE of downtown, so it was a 1.5 hour drive for me. I miss it so much. There was a 100 acre field right behind my house so I used to run my three goldens every single day, because that breed needs a lot of exercise. We bought a large home with a swimming pool and two acres for a pittance. No traffic, lovely people, and a very safe community. I think the biggest news in town was about after being there for five years, someone reported a burglary. I wish I could just pack up and move there again. People make fun of Cleveland, but it is not the way it was decades ago, when the river caught on fire. It look more like Chicago to me. But the suburbs are very WHITE. When we had a consensus, 100% of the people in NR were white. Not much of a melting pot. That's too bad.

[[be...]]

It's weird, because in the mornings I don't feel like I can do it.  In the evenings, I think I can.

 

Which me do I believe?

 

The evening me. Once you are off, before you know it the evening me will become the morning me as well. Hang tough Jerry!