15 cuts to go....

[[th...]]

Working my way down, 15 cuts to go, that's how I am looking at it. Makes the process more bearable. I am just under 1mg now making .0625mg cuts. I am still really sick with wd syx but I am pushing thru. I hope to jump in Jan. People around me don't understand how "such a small dose could be causing so much problems....why don't you just quit now?" It's frustrating bc even if I do explain they don't get it and eventually their eyes roll to the back of their head. Or I get a lot of "you don't look sick so you must be better" that one I hate....bc make up, nice hair and a fake smile for an hr do not equal not sick!  But I know it doesn't matter what people think, it only matters what I do. I am 100% focused on this taper and will see it thru to the end. My hope is that as I get lower in dose some syx will retreat. Sleeping would be nice  But I am prepared for things to get worse too, it won't stop me. I have been in literal hell for 3 yrs with this and can pretty much survive an apocalypse at this point!

 

Bring on the last part of this taper!!! Let's do this!!!

 

Grinch 

[Guest [Mi...]]

Aw, Grinch, you are a true warrior, my friend.

 

I like reading your posts because as much as you're suffering, there's a sense of positive energy that always comes through. 

 

Keep going. We'll have a big cyber celebration in January to celebrate your jump!

 

Yeah, "let's do this!!!" is right! 

[Guest [Ma...]]

Right on Grinch!

You describe perfectly the reactions of many people.

It's a masquerade- paper faces on parade as we slog through each day.

Love your spirit!

Much success and healing to you as you move forward.

 

Marija

 

[[be...]]

Say he ya for you G! January is not so far away, compared to the months of struggle you have been though already. Good luck. I know you'll make it and then really begin a true healing process. Hell, you may have few symptoms once you jump. Stranger things have happened. Hugs, Bets

[[ru...]]

Hang in there Grinch. You certainly deserve to feel well and I admire your determination. 

[[co...]]

Love your courage and determination!! You're doing great! 

[[Ch...]]

[[Mo...]]

Thats awesome Grinch!  January will be here before you know it.  You will do fine.  When I got to my lower doses, I felt better so it is possible.  Don't worry about what others think, they are not the one tapering.  I couldn't believe how cutting small doses were noticeable either but for me it was.  Good Luck! 

[[gr...]]

Cheering for you Grinch. No one can understand the hell we are in except us. A friend drove by my home yesterday as i struggled to take my garbage out. I hadnt seen them for over a year. I tried to explain....they responded with, well make sure you stay busy excercising and doing things. Ahhh ya. OK.

 

They dont get it. Take care hun.

[[Di...]]

Go Grinch, Go! 

[[al...]]

You got this Grinch!!!

[[Fr...]]

Your doing great!                                                                                                                              Froggy(Toni)

[[th...]]

To everyone...

 

G

[[th...]]

Cheering for you Grinch. No one can understand the hell we are in except us. A friend drove by my home yesterday as i struggled to take my garbage out. I hadnt seen them for over a year. I tried to explain....they responded with, well make sure you stay busy excercising and doing things. Ahhh ya. OK.

 

They dont get it. Take care hun.

 

It's sick I know but that made me laugh! I get that all the time! And I say exactly that "ahhh ya..ok" haha. I visited my sister in law this past wk end and all she did was give me career advice. I still can't work bc of syx but I didn't go into detail with her that's just too exhausting...she spent 2 hrs telling me what I need to do for a job. I effing know what I NEED to do! But I can't!

 

I said, "ahhh ya...ok".... Lol. ;-)

 

G

[[gr...]]

Cheering for you Grinch. No one can understand the hell we are in except us. A friend drove by my home yesterday as i struggled to take my garbage out. I hadnt seen them for over a year. I tried to explain....they responded with, well make sure you stay busy excercising and doing things. Ahhh ya. OK.

 

They dont get it. Take care hun.

 

It's sick I know but that made me laugh! I get that all the time! And I say exactly that "ahhh ya..ok" haha. I visited my sister in law this past wk end and all she did was give me career advice. I still can't work bc of syx but I didn't go into detail with her that's just too exhausting...she spent 2 hrs telling me what I need to do for a job. I effing know what I NEED to do! But I can't!

 

I said, "ahhh ya...ok".... Lol. ;-)

 

G

 

Im so exhausted from all of this G. Im tired of talking to myself even. Sick of hearing myself complain in my head!

The work thing...my God. I wake up everyday and think pfffft, how can i possibly work. IMPOSSIBLE. Just makes things worse not being able to be active or even leave the damn house. Ive been out of bed for only 4 hrs now. Im ready to go back. If i could actually sleep, i would just go fall on the bed. I swear im gonn breakdown and take a remeron one of these nights so i can sleep. They are probably expired now though.

[[th...]]

Groove,

 

Oh ya. Tired of listening to myself. I don't even want or like people to ask me how I am bc honesty I am sick and tired of talking about it! I honestly just sugar coat it now and down play it all bc I just can't keep repeating the same thing over and over. I don't want people to ask me how I am bc I never know what to say! Fine? No. The truth? No. What...??

 

I ll just stay in my house until it's over. It's so much easier.

 

G

 

 

[[gr...]]

Sometimes i wish i WOULD get dementia, alzheimers so i could just forget EVERYTHING. Im 50 percent there anyways!

Everyday its the same broken record. Someone unplug me please.

[[th...]]

Sometimes i wish i WOULD get dementia, alzheimers so i could just forget EVERYTHING. Im 50 percent there anyways!

Everyday its the same broken record. Someone unplug me please.

 

Well my dad told me once "if I get Alzheimer's just put me in a home and forget about me...I won't know who you are anyway" ....Well, I wouldn't do that to my dad if that happens and I won't do that to you now Groove 

 

WE ARE GONNA BEAT THIS TOGETHER MY FRIEND!! One day showering will be easy again 

 

G

[[gr...]]

Sometimes i wish i WOULD get dementia, alzheimers so i could just forget EVERYTHING. Im 50 percent there anyways!

Everyday its the same broken record. Someone unplug me please.

 

Well my dad told me once "if I get Alzheimer's just put me in a home and forget about me...I won't know who you are anyway" ....Well, I wouldn't do that to my dad if that happens and I won't do that to you now Groove 

 

WE ARE GONNA BEAT THIS TOGETHER MY FRIEND!! One day showering will be easy again 

 

G

 

OK G TY for that. My Grandma had it...it was very sad, she had to move in with us, then eventually that wasnt enough to keep her safe. I often had to go out looking for her cuz she would get lost. When i would pull over and ask her to get in my car she wouldnt know who i was and refused until i dropped my Dads name on her, she never forgot who he was.

 

Take care, hope u get some sleep.