Convinced

[[sa...]]

That I'm not healing. My depression continues to get worse. Everyday I wake feeling lower and lower. Seeing new doc tomorrow but skeptical anything will help. Please give me hope we all heal someday.

[Guest [Mi...]]

Umm. . . I'm not convinced. Why are you convinced? It's only been a few months.

 

We're going to heal, satch. I know it. I get these thoughts, too, but it's just the benzo lies.

 

You've got a LOT to look forward to once you're finally off the support meds. The world is going to look a lot better, my friend. 

 

Keeps us posted on the new pdoc. Hope he's benzo wise.

[[sa...]]

Thanks mind. Just feeling worse everyday with new symptoms emerging like burning hands.

[Guest [Mi...]]

Several buddies who were on Seroquel mention burning sensations. Please mention this to your new doctor. I hope he can get you set up with a safe taper plan for your other meds.

 

Hang in there, satch. You are going to walk away from this with a completely different perspective than what you have now. That's what's keeping me going - I know that life off these drugs is something I can't wait to experience. Just gotta survive the withdrawal. And you're like me - it's not just benzos. It's all the other drugs, too. But we'll get there. 

[[sa...]]

I'm scared mind. See no good end to this. I've lost an entire life to this and I really don't want to rebuild. I had what I wanted and now it's gone.

[Guest [Mi...]]

You know, I thought I had what I wanted, but I really didn't. I didn't know anything about being mis-diagnosed. Figured I'd be on these drugs forever.

 

I can't predict the future, but I have a feeling it's going to be so much better for this journey.

 

Can you even imagine a better life than you had, satch? Why not? We're already living the unimaginable! Why shouldn't the future be better?

[[Ri...]]

That I'm not healing. My depression continues to get worse. Everyday I wake feeling lower and lower. Seeing new doc tomorrow but skeptical anything will help. Please give me hope we all heal someday.

 

Satch - I'm really sad to see you suffering so badly.

 

You said that you are "Convinced that I'm not healing"  - you have not had a chance to get significant healing yet because you are still on psych drugs. You are still in the stage where you have to push through to the point where you can really heal at a faster rate.

 

I hope your appt with the Dr goes well. And I wanted to remind you to be careful and think twice about more meds.

 

When one is in acute withdrawal, it is very tempting to say "give me something to stop the suffering" but in most cases what is needed is TIME. Time to let your receptors regrow.

 

They cannot sell you time.

 

In my case, the smartest thing I did for my recovery was to say "NO" to my doctor trying to push more meds on me.

 

If I had listened to him I would not be benzo free and feeling good. I was suffering so badly  I knew instinctively, that the drugs were the problem and to not switch or start on more - 

 

. . . and to just ride it out.

 

Be careful, because desperate people do desperate things, and your history shows how poly drugging does not make you feel better in the long run.

 

Our biggest trap is the prescription cascade where withdrawal symptoms are medicated - leading to more symptoms - leading to more meds - with more side effects and symptoms and then you are getting in deeper and deeper and on and on it goes -  and you will never get free

 

. . . until you just say "NO".

 

.  .  .  "No new drugs - I'm tapering off the ones I'm on and then I'm done with psych drugs."

 

 

That's how I made it out -  I just suffered through it -  And now I'm happy.

 

 

 

 

River 

 

 

[[Be...]]

I am right there with ypu satch i feel the same way and have lost everythinf too and am about to loose my dad, after only 10 weeks of lorazepam....i have no words but keep on like i am.

[[Mo...]]

Thanks mind. Just feeling worse everyday with new symptoms emerging like burning hands.

 

Burning hands, feet, elbows ...are all withdrawl sxs, my bum burned so much

i thought i was going to put the chair on fire.

to my knowledge nothing to do with seroquel, cold turkey can be tough satch,

but temporary and will go away again.

[[sa...]]

Being trapped on psych drugs is what causes me to want to end it. Very scared I'm doomed by psychiatry forever.

[[be...]]

Being trapped on psych drugs is what causes me to want to end it. Very scared I'm doomed by psychiatry forever.

 

Satch I am sorry you are feeling so badly. I know that you have been suffering a long time. Why do you think you are "trapped" on psych drugs? You can always do a slow taper. Both your doses of remeron and serequel are fairly low doses to begin from. If it was me and all my depression was from the fact that I worried about having a taper in front of me, I would begin a taper. However, if I felt that I wanted to end it, I would try to find a place to go inpatient, which I have done multiple times.

[[sa...]]

New doc wants to up remeron since I'm so depressed. Says I'm definately in benzo wd still.

[[Ri...]]

Being trapped on psych drugs is what causes me to want to end it. Very scared I'm doomed by psychiatry forever.

 

New doc wants to up remeron since I'm so depressed. Says I'm definately in benzo wd still.

 

Satch -  They want to change this drug, increase that drug - drugs are what they do. . .

 

Benzo recovery is based on TIME, not more drugs.

 

Deep depression and suicidal thoughts are normal and are part of the process. You must learn to live with these until they pass.

 

If you do not learn how to live with these feelings, and go back for more drugs to manage them, you are setting yourself up for more torture.

 

IMO if you keep going to get more drugs you are trapping yourself. Look at your role in this.

 

The doctor is not going to come to your house and force more on you.

 

Ever heard of the saying there is no hope with dope? Well that doesn't just mean street drugs.

 

If you keep your car pointed away from the Dealer you will clean up in time.

 

 

There is a very fine line between living with these nasty feelings and acting on them. If you learn how to live with them your recovery is sped up.

 

The object is to survive, and if you need more drugs to survive - take them. But if you learn to live with the feelings you will recover faster IMO.

 

 

River 

 

 

[[sa...]]

River. Put on the meds in detox. Too unstable to taper yet. Trust me I know they are poison. Just feel I need to get stronger before tapering.  I wish I was off now. I feel doomed by psychiatry.

[[sa...]]

I am so scared today. Have to leave stepmoms and go be alone. Just can't believe what has happened to my life.