CHECKING IN -- 13 months free of benzos

[[Ma...]]

For those of you just beginning your journey: hold on tight.  It's a ride indeed.  But, doable.  And you will be fine and come out the other side.  Remember WHY you are off these drugs, and it will make each & every day more worth it.

 

The beginning was scary and difficult, but I never once thought of taking a rescue dose or turning back.  I knew that every day with the drug out of my system was a day closer to my brain healing.

 

I don't know if my symptoms are from benzo withdrawal for sure...the ones that remain...but I'll guess that they are.  Today was a hard day.  Stress affects me quickly and like a ton of bricks.  I went to an Alanon meeting today and it saved my butt because my mind was preoccupied with my husband and whatever he's going through.  The meeting helped me remember I can only be responsible for myself & no one else.

 

The symptoms that linger and still taunt me are: depression, severe tinnitus, depersonalization/derealization, fatigue, visual irregularities.

 

I wonder if the tinnitus will ever go away.  It doesn't even seem to be diminishing.

 

I thank the good LORD above for my family, my pups & my church for being such incredible support.  Also, Benzo Buddies who made things a lot more clear and made me able to connect with humanity during the really tough times.

[[cr...]]

Wow I cant believe you still have those symptoms after 13 months. Those are my symptoms that I hate the most and I wonder myself if they will ever go away. After 13 months you would think they would start to dissipate, I mean do they eventually go away? Does it take 2 or 3 years for them to finally go away? The tinnitus and the lack of focus is what scares me. Is there anyone out there that has healed and knows if you have been on benzos for 8-10 years pretty heavy like you and I have been, if those syptoms go away and how long it actually takes? I would really like to get some feedback from someone who has had them go away. I also did cold turkey and really hope it doesn't take me 5 years to feel normal again as I have seen some cases where people feel dizzy and confused still after 2 years!

[[Ma...]]

Wow I cant believe you still have those symptoms after 13 months. Those are my symptoms that I hate the most and I wonder myself if they will ever go away. After 13 months you would think they would start to dissipate, I mean do they eventually go away? Does it take 2 or 3 years for them to finally go away? The tinnitus and the lack of focus is what scares me. Is there anyone out there that has healed and knows if you have been on benzos for 8-10 years pretty heavy like you and I have been, if those syptoms go away and how long it actually takes? I would really like to get some feedback from someone who has had them go away. I also did cold turkey and really hope it doesn't take me 5 years to feel normal again as I have seen some cases where people feel dizzy and confused still after 2 years!

 

It's hard to discern if these symptoms are strictly benzo-related.  I know antidepressants can cause tinnitus, so I am trying to taper off Wellbutrin.  My husband also has tinnitus very bad and is tapering off Xanax but still on other antideoressant-type meds. 

 

Also, I am a musician and for several years spent several hours with headphones on, recording, at a high volume. 

 

So, who knows?  The brain responds to all kinds of input, be it medications, environment, stress reactions, etc. so it's difficult to pinpoint from where specifically a symptom comes.....

 

I do know I feel a whole lot better than when in acute; that's for sure.  This past year post-coldturkey has been a blur, although I still kept up many activities.

 

I have read River Wolf's writings and the threads on Benzo-specific loneliness, and wondering if I am experiencing that.  Sometimes I feel invisible.  I know I am likeable and moderately attractive, so I think my perception that I have no ability to connect or that others don't want to get close to me, could be in my head.  But it feels very real.  It's an odd sort of loneliness.  I can only handle relationships with my close family and my dogs.  Anything more I can only handle in very brief spurts or I get overwhelmed.

[Guest [Lu...]]

Wow I cant believe you still have those symptoms after 13 months. Those are my symptoms that I hate the most and I wonder myself if they will ever go away. After 13 months you would think they would start to dissipate, I mean do they eventually go away? Does it take 2 or 3 years for them to finally go away? The tinnitus and the lack of focus is what scares me. Is there anyone out there that has healed and knows if you have been on benzos for 8-10 years pretty heavy like you and I have been, if those syptoms go away and how long it actually takes? I would really like to get some feedback from someone who has had them go away. I also did cold turkey and really hope it doesn't take me 5 years to feel normal again as I have seen some cases where people feel dizzy and confused still after 2 years!

 

It's hard to discern if these symptoms are strictly benzo-related.  I know antidepressants can cause tinnitus, so I am trying to taper off Wellbutrin.  My husband also has tinnitus very bad and is tapering off Xanax but still on other antideoressant-type meds. 

 

Also, I am a musician and for several years spent several hours with headphones on, recording, at a high volume. 

 

So, who knows?  The brain responds to all kinds of input, be it medications, environment, stress reactions, etc. so it's difficult to pinpoint from where specifically a symptom comes.....

 

I do know I feel a whole lot better than when in acute; that's for sure.  This past year post-coldturkey has been a blur, although I still kept up many activities.

 

I have read River Wolf's writings and the threads on Benzo-specific loneliness, and wondering if I am experiencing that.  Sometimes I feel invisible.  I know I am likeable and moderately attractive, so I think my perception that I have no ability to connect or that others don't want to get close to me, could be in my head.  But it feels very real.  It's an odd sort of loneliness.  I can only handle relationships with my close family and my dogs.  Anything more I can only handle in very brief spurts or I get overwhelmed.

 

I don't know if this helps you or not, but when I was on Wellbutrin (way before the benzos) I got tinnitus and dp/dr something awful. It went away 3 days after stopping the med! A lot easier than benzos lol!

[[Ma...]]

Wow I cant believe you still have those symptoms after 13 months. Those are my symptoms that I hate the most and I wonder myself if they will ever go away. After 13 months you would think they would start to dissipate, I mean do they eventually go away? Does it take 2 or 3 years for them to finally go away? The tinnitus and the lack of focus is what scares me. Is there anyone out there that has healed and knows if you have been on benzos for 8-10 years pretty heavy like you and I have been, if those syptoms go away and how long it actually takes? I would really like to get some feedback from someone who has had them go away. I also did cold turkey and really hope it doesn't take me 5 years to feel normal again as I have seen some cases where people feel dizzy and confused still after 2 years!

 

It's hard to discern if these symptoms are strictly benzo-related.  I know antidepressants can cause tinnitus, so I am trying to taper off Wellbutrin.  My husband also has tinnitus very bad and is tapering off Xanax but still on other antideoressant-type meds. 

 

Also, I am a musician and for several years spent several hours with headphones on, recording, at a high volume. 

 

So, who knows?  The brain responds to all kinds of input, be it medications, environment, stress reactions, etc. so it's difficult to pinpoint from where specifically a symptom comes.....

 

I do know I feel a whole lot better than when in acute; that's for sure.  This past year post-coldturkey has been a blur, although I still kept up many activities.

 

I have read River Wolf's writings and the threads on Benzo-specific loneliness, and wondering if I am experiencing that.  Sometimes I feel invisible.  I know I am likeable and moderately attractive, so I think my perception that I have no ability to connect or that others don't want to get close to me, could be in my head.  But it feels very real.  It's an odd sort of loneliness.  I can only handle relationships with my close family and my dogs.  Anything more I can only handle in very brief spurts or I get overwhelmed.

 

I don't know if this helps you or not, but when I was on Wellbutrin (way before the benzos) I got tinnitus and dp/dr something awful. It went away 3 days after stopping the med! A lot easier than benzos lol!

 

Hey Luigithepug,

 

Cute name!  I do appreciate your info on wellbutrin.  I am on 150 mg. and just picked up a script for 75 mg. so I guess I will start to taper.  This tinnitus is kind of unbelievable.  a very loud, high-pitched shrill tone ALL THE TIME.  thanks for the encouragement to get off this drug.