Kindling is there any hope once your past a certain point? Please anyone!? Help!

[[Mo...]]

Im scared about the kindling post since Ive tried tappering and been reinstated on the librium 4-5 times now.  The last one was unbelievable!  I was bedridden at 93 mgs! What hope will I have trying to taper from 100 mgs this time?

[[Mo...]]

Anyone moderators?!

[[Ju...]]

Have you stopped benzo use completely and then started back up?  I don't believe kindling refers to going up and down in dose.  If this was the case, I would have certainly kindled because I very frequently went up and down in dose over the course of many years.  I did not experience this. 

 

Quite frankly, I would not let this worry me.  I mean you already know you're having a difficult time tapering, right?  If kindling is causing this, who knows, but the fact remains you are having a problem tapering.  Kindling just means that a person might have a more difficult withdrawal if they begin benzos again for a second time after completely withdrawing.  But lots of folks have trouble withdrawing the first time too. 

 

I would not worry about this because if it turns out to be the case, what's done is done and going back in time can't happen.  People who experience kindling heal too. 

 

I would concentrate more on getting my mind wrapped around the idea that I NEEDED to taper in order to heal and get my life back.  Until you come to terms with this, then I believe you're pretty stuck.  Personally I believe you should look seriously at titration to taper Librium.  Librium is water soluble and tiny, tiny, tiny cuts so small that your body can tolerate can be made via titration.  But you shoot this concept down so other than titration, I don't know what to suggest.  Compounded small dose reductions did not work.  So the next step would be titration.

 

Good luck.

[[be...]]

Each time you kindle your next experience of getting off is worse and more difficult. But did you actually kindle? ~~ Bets

[[me...]]

Well, my opinion may not be what you want to hear, but here it is.  I think you have to stop scaring yourself with things like "kindling," and just concentrate on getting off benzos for good.  That and nothing else.

 

Many people have kindled, yet they still get off benzos successfully . I definitely kindled, but as far as I was concerned, whether or not I kindled was "spilt milk."  I other words, it had already happened, and there was nothing I could do to change it!  So obsessing about it would have done me absolutely no good.  I decided to keep my "eyes on the prize," which was getting off Xanax once and for all.  It wasn't easy, in fact it was the hardest thing I've ever done, but I did it.

 

You can get off benzos.  But for a while, anyway, getting off benzos and staying off has to be the most important thing in your life.  That's my opinion.

 

[[Se...]]

I do not know about kindling at all, but I have worked very hard to focus on just GETTING OFF! We all tend to want to look backward and feel rage and frustration which causes fear, and BB has helped me to focus forward and feel HOPE. Look ahead....think about being well and having your life back. That's the real prize. This will so hard--no one is trying to say it isn't--but know that it isn't really you thinking all this, it's the drug chatter.

 

I really focused a lot of effort reading the Success Stories  http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?board=89.0

and that got me really thinking and believing that I too could one day write one. The stories are all so similar and yet totally different. They all made it--often against very severe circumstances.  I focused on getting excited about making that cut, and I have a sigh of relief every time I take a little less. Best wishes and keep us posted.

[[Mo...]]

Have you stopped benzo use completely and then started back up?  I don't believe kindling refers to going up and down in dose.  If this was the case, I would have certainly kindled because I very frequently went up and down in dose over the course of many years.  I did not experience this. 

 

Quite frankly, I would not let this worry me.  I mean you already know you're having a difficult time tapering, right?  If kindling is causing this, who knows, but the fact remains you are having a problem tapering.  Kindling just means that a person might have a more difficult withdrawal if they begin benzos again for a second time after completely withdrawing.  But lots of folks have trouble withdrawing the first time too. 

 

I would not worry about this because if it turns out to be the case, what's done is done and going back in time can't happen.  People who experience kindling heal too. 

 

I would concentrate more on getting my mind wrapped around the idea that I NEEDED to taper in order to heal and get my life back.  Until you come to terms with this, then I believe you're pretty stuck.  Personally I believe you should look seriously at titration to taper Librium.  Librium is water soluble and tiny, tiny, tiny cuts so small that your body can tolerate can be made via titration.  But you shoot this concept down so other than titration, I don't know what to suggest.  Compounded small dose reductions did not work.  So the next step would be titration.

 

Good luck.

I didnt shoot it down my doctor did Im not very familiar with liquid titration heck I cant even open my capsules up Ive tried that before and couldn't do it cause my hands were so shakey and weak.  Im not sure if this is so hArd for me because of my previous history before benZos of anxiety disorder, panic disorder, MDD, and PTSD, especially of wds cause I almost died from alcohol wds in 2009 after trying to cT drinking after 6 years of binge drinking, I was vomiting up blood and was hospitalized became jaundiced couldn't walk took me 6 months + to recover.  I was able to successfully taper off lorazapam before the birth of my second daughter no problem in about 3 months. but this Librium and all the major wd symptoms i get when tapering by just a few mgs gets harder everytime i try.  I lost my home my health and my sanity trying to drop don't think my husband his family or my daughters can handle me in such a horrific state.  So Yes I do feel stuck how would I liquid titrate 100 mgs of librium and how long would that take?  Im sorry but because of my short term memory loss I don't remember where I read about kindling the guy or gal has a ticker of a black cat hope that helps. Ty Mo2

[[Ju...]]

I would open a post on titration taper plans to get some ideas about my taper.

 

No, the black can ticker does not help me locate the thread.  Do you remember what section of the board it was posted in?

[[Mo...]]

Have you stopped benzo use completely and then started back up?  I don't believe kindling refers to going up and down in dose.  If this was the case, I would have certainly kindled because I very frequently went up and down in dose over the course of many years.  I did not experience this. 

 

Quite frankly, I would not let this worry me.  I mean you already know you're having a difficult time tapering, right?  If kindling is causing this, who knows, but the fact remains you are having a problem tapering.  Kindling just means that a person might have a more difficult withdrawal if they begin benzos again for a second time after completely withdrawing.  But lots of folks have trouble withdrawing the first time too. 

 

I would not worry about this because if it turns out to be the case, what's done is done and going back in time can't happen.  People who experience kindling heal too. 

 

I would concentrate more on getting my mind wrapped around the idea that I NEEDED to taper in order to heal and get my life back.  Until you come to terms with this, then I believe you're pretty stuck.  Personally I believe you should look seriously at titration to taper Librium.  Librium is water soluble and tiny, tiny, tiny cuts so small that your body can tolerate can be made via titration.  But you shoot this concept down so other than titration, I don't know what to suggest.  Compounded small dose reductions did not work.  So the next step would be titration.

 

Good luck.

I didnt shoot it down my doctor did Im not very familiar with liquid titration heck I cant even open my capsules up Ive tried that before and couldn't do it cause my hands were so shakey and weak.  Im not sure if this is so hArd for me because of my previous history before benZos of anxiety disorder, panic disorder, MDD, and PTSD, especially of wds cause I almost died from alcohol wds in 2009 after trying to cT drinking after 6 years of binge drinking, I was vomiting up blood and was hospitalized became jaundiced couldn't walk took me 6 months + to recover.  I was able to successfully taper off lorazapam before the birth of my second daughter no problem in about 3 months. but this Librium and all the major wd symptoms i get when tapering by just a few mgs gets harder everytime i try.  I lost my home my health and my sanity trying to drop don't think my husband his family or my daughters can handle me in such a horrific state.  So Yes I do feel stuck how would I liquid titrate 100 mgs of librium and how long would that take?  Im sorry but because of my short term memory loss I don't remember where I read about kindling the guy or gal has a ticker of a black cat hope that helps. Ty Mo2 Also yes I got off of lorazepam 3&1/2 years ago and was clean free of benzos used them once during traveling down here last july2013 then started again in dec2013 as my signature suggests so I guess thats kindling right?

[[Ju...]]

mommyof2 posted:  Also yes I got off of lorazepam 3&1/2 years ago and was clean free of benzos used them once during traveling down here last july2013 then started again in dec2013 as my signature suggests so I guess thats kindling right?

 

Yes, this does suggest kindling since you have withdrawn before.  I would utilize this information as a validation to myself that there is indeed a reason why this is so difficult for me.  Then I would buckle down and very slowly get myself tapered off and heal.

 

You'll get there! 

[[Mo...]]

Ty Juleia! I will ty posting on the titration boards. 

[[Mo...]]

mommyof2 posted:  Also yes I got off of lorazepam 3&1/2 years ago and was clean free of benzos used them once during traveling down here last july2013 then started again in dec2013 as my signature suggests so I guess thats kindling right?

 

Yes, this does suggest kindling since you have withdrawn before.  I would utilize this information as a validation to myself that there is indeed a reason why this is so difficult for me.  Then I would buckle down and very slowly get myself tapered off and heal.

 

You'll get there! 

I posted on the titration boards no responses yet.  Also would be great if my kaiser vs bluecross anthem could get bumped somewhere other than chewing the fat as no one seems to be responding to it there.  Im new to the socal mental health system.  I used to live here but that was about ten years ago before I was diagnosed with all my disorders.

[[la...]]

I quickly tapered off years ago and then when things got rough went back on because I thought I can just easily taper off again. Boy the joke was on me huh? I had no idea WD existed, I thought one could taper off at will with no problems, I had no idea, if I did I could have avoided this whole mess. I wonder how many people tapered off with no trouble then get back on and then this happen to them? I bet alot.

[[Mo...]]

I quickly tapered off years ago and then when things got rough went back on because I thought I can just easily taper off again. Boy the joke was on me huh? I had no idea WD existed, I thought one could taper off at will with no problems, I had no idea, if I did I could have avoided this whole mess. I wonder how many people tapered off with no trouble then get back on and then this happen to them? I bet alot.

Did you taper off completely and then go back on again?