Confused and alone. Lorazepam withdrawals

[[Jo...]]

I'm new to this site. I'm overwhelmed with what knowledge I've gotten about benzos in the past day. To give a quick summation of my history. Suffered severe anxiety attack march 2010. Prescribed Zoloft and lorazepam. Concerned about addictive nature of lorazepam and discussed with doctor. He promised he would not let me becoming addicted. 1 year later he was still prescribing lorazepam 3mg/day. He moved and 3 years later and 3 doctors later still being prescribed lorazepam with not 1 doctor concerned with me being dependent.

After being taken off Zoloft and given cymbalta. I had severe adverse reaction to cymbalta. Admitted myself into a 28 day treatment center for severe anxiety and insomnia. Treatment centers policy was no benzos so I took my last dose of lorazepam 4/25/2014 before being admitted.

While at center sent to ER twice for concern of stroke. At 5 days Treatment center observed symptoms of brain seizure and diagnosed me with temporal lobe seizures and prescribed anti-seizure meds.  I called my family to tell them this new diagnosis. My mother researched and told my husband this could be lorazepam withdrawals so he came to facility to discuss with doctors what was wrong with me. My husband expressed his concerned it could be withdrawals from being taken off lorazepam cold turkey. The nurse said 'no, I was detoxed within 72 hours and the drugs were no longer in my system'. She stuck with temporal lobe defect diagnosis and said I needed to see a neurologist and needed to stay there for the remaining 3 weeks because they could monitor me. My husband said he was taking me home and taking me to a Neurologist and our family doctor.

I came home and was taken to family doctor. Husband expressed concern this seizures could be lorazepam withdrawal. Doctor said 'no, it was out of my system'. The doctor said iT could be temporal lobe defect and I needed to see neurologist but this was not lorazepam withdrawals. This was at 9 days cold turkey.

Now I am at 5 months cold turkey. 2 specialist have ran tests and found no physical ailment for problems and that symptoms were most likely from lorazepam withdrawal. Both of the specialist doctors said what was done to me could have caused my death and no one should go cold turkey from a benzo drug.

Today I am much better. I have good days and bad days. It seems when the bad days come they last for several days into a couple of weeks.

I also have a new doctor and have been released from the care of the neurologist cause my brain has no defect. 

I still struggle with strange symptoms after doing well for awhile. I am on this group to be more proactive in my care now that I have the mental capability to learn this information. And hopefully to not feel so alone.

Thanks for reading and for the support.

[[Ch...]]

It's great to read that you're having good days even if you're still having bad ones as well.  We refer to the good times as 'windows' (windows showing us what life will be like once our central nervous systems are well healed) and 'waves' (waves of symptoms). 

 

This will pass, it just takes more time than anyone would ever imagine as a result of taking prescribed medication.  It's called 'iatrogenic illness'...caused by generally practiced medicine.

 

Lots of great people here.  I think the company of others will be reassuring to you while you heal from the c/t.  And you'll heal.