Windows to total recovery?

[[Sm...]]

Hello all,

 

I am 2.5 months out, after completing my taper.  I have had a lot of emotional symptoms (fear and anxiety), which have gotten better.  My memory is returning (after those intrusive memories started happening), and my ability to use language has improved.  I still have trouble speaking sometimes, which often troubles me.  I often can't get the right word out, say the wrong word, or I slur words together.  I still am very fatigued, mentally and physically, and I have very little interest to do things, and my attention span is very short.  I am a people person, but I find myself uninterested in my friends, which also disturbs me.  I have a job with a lot of responsibility, and I find that I cannot concentrate well, and I don't want that to affect my performance.  My job exhausts me. I often feel like I am in a fog, although things are getting clearer. 

 

I started taking Klonopin to ease my headaches and help me sleep, since I believe my headaches are nerve based.  Since I have gone off the benzo, my headaches are severe.  They feel like the nerves in my head are not working right, often like my head is hot, and it feels like I have less blood going through my head.  I know this sounds weird, but it's the only way I can describe it.  Caffeine makes my headaches worse and I feel even slower as a human being.  I often feel like I am in slow motion.  While I try to be pleasant, I recognize that my irritability is a part of the recovery process, and I hate it.  I often feel like I am not in control of my own mind, which is a strange sort of helplessness.

 

I believe I hit tolerance a year ago during a difficult season of my life, and have been feeling awful since then.  I noticed then that I felt really mentally dull! When I did my taper, it was a nightmare, but I feel the worst is over.  SO my question is, can anyone speak to those symptoms (particularly the weird headache, but the others as well), and do the windows where things get clearer just get larger?  More frequent?  I have days where I feel my reaction time is quicker, but it's not a lot quicker, and it's not often.

 

Any encouragement is welcome.

[[be...]]

Beta blockers can sometimes work for headaches. I suffered from sever migraines in early withdrawal. Once I started on propananol 6 months ago I have never had another one.